little_aliceee

Search for a member

Offline (the 07/07/2016 at 2:36pm)

little_aliceee

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1509
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About little_aliceee : I am not a grammar Nazi; I am a grammar Christian. I like to condemn people for being wrong even when I don't know the rules myself.

little_aliceee's page activity

Visits<b>Laeffy</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 8:50pm<b>bradoiler</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 11:44pm<b>savannah12345677</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 11:37pm<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 11:47pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 12:03am<b>TommyG493</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 3:01pm<b>tykatdesigns</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 11:21pm<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 7:20pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 12:34pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 9:54am<b>kaitlynb01</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:21am<b>fader48080</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:20am<b>DenverTyrrell</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 7:24am<b>ADBurns</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 5:12pm<b>WaistDownUnder</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 6:04pm<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 4:23am<b>Kodiakken</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 1:35pm<b>disgruntledchef</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 8:40am

little_aliceee's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of little_aliceee's badges

little_aliceee's favorite FMLs

Today, while trying to score a date, I almost made a girl pass out. No, I didn't try to chloroform this one. I just came across as so pathetic that she laughed hard enough to have an asthma attack. FML

by Anonymous / 07/18/2015 at 11:45pm / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Miscellaneous

Today, while waiting the required 5 minutes for my hair removal cream to work, my cat rubbed all over my legs while I wasn't looking. After getting clawed to death throwing her in the bath to get the cream off, all her hair on that side fell off. I now have a half hairless cat. FML

by coolcat10156 / 07/08/2015 at 3:04am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I took new sleeping meds. One of the side effects was sleepwalking. I had a dream my girlfriend wanted me to pee on her. Apparently, while sleepwalking, I pissed all over our dog. FML

by feels like an asshole / 06/09/2015 at 4:03pm / United States / Health

Today, my roommate's noisiest cat passed away. My previously-silent cat has decided that someone has to fill the void, and has been running around the apartment howling ever since. FML

by Crazy cat lady / 04/10/2015 at 11:20am / Canada (Manitoba) / Animals

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

by killme / 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2014 at 8:38pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, in a supermarket, my four-year-old son whispered to me, asking if the checkout lady was able to wash between her fat rolls. She heard. FML

by super maman / 09/29/2014 at 11:08pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Kids

Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out of a store. FML

by nocat6 / 09/14/2014 at 11:07pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

by LyraAlluse / 05/18/2014 at 7:35pm / United States (Arizona) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

by fuckyouharddad / 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was feeling horny, so I told my boyfriend, who lives 30 minutes away, that "I really needed him". He replied, "Did you fall in the toilet again?" FML

by that girl / 04/08/2014 at 7:06pm / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, I downloaded a movie for my mom that she really likes, "When Harry Met Sally". When she loaded the file, we soon found out it was actually some kind of obscure porno billed as "When Harry Wet Sally". FML

by Anonymous / 01/05/2014 at 6:48pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my boss's obese bully of a grandson had a seizure. Being the only physician around, I had to rush in to tend to him. Except it wasn't a seizure as such. My daughter had found my taser and used it on him. FML

by Anonymous / 11/26/2013 at 2:05pm / United States (New York) / Kids