Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lilpsyco

Offline (the 03/26/2015 at 7:20pm) | Search for a member

lilpsyco

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 December 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1104
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About lilpsyco : There is a strong possibility my name is Liam.

I try to not judge anyone by appearance, sexual preferences, or past mistakes.

My favorite bands are:
Avenge Sevenfold, Disturbed, Five Finger Death Punch, Bullet for My Valentine, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Stone Sour, Black Veil Brides, August Burns Red, Asking Alexandria, My Chemical Romance, We As Human, and Slipknot

PujwI' HIvlu'chugh quvbe'lu'.

Not to be rude, but if you actually have the time or desire to read the entirety of this then you may need to reevaluate your priorities.

lilpsyco's page activity

Visits<b>rhysfucker</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 8:29pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:34pm<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 5:40pm<b>MythicalPanda</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:12am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:08pm<b>umerin</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 3:30am<b>speakersboom</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 7:25pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 1:13pm<b>quizzy77</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 3:41am<b>CTPope74</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 10:27pm<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 10:00am<b>snazman12</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Amanyyyyyy</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 3:53pm<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 9:30pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 4:54pm<b>octopussperm125</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 9:52pm<b>GreentacoDerp</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 4:08pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 8:06pm

Liked!<b>dylanger16</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 10:39pm<b>rhysfucker</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 2:43am

lilpsyco's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of lilpsyco's badges

lilpsyco's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML

#20945220
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45986) - you deserved it (10240)

On 11/04/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by barebackingit (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came across some bubble wrap. Turned out it was a special type of bubble wrap that cannot be popped. FML

#20924315
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48056) - you deserved it (4354)

On 10/17/2013 at 6:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48212) - you deserved it (3070)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

#20908628
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50473) - you deserved it (6808)

On 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by -____- (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43253) - you deserved it (5480)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48932) - you deserved it (6395)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML

#20894419
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52907) - you deserved it (5069)

On 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm - intimacy - by Craigslist is Evil. - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a man walked into the bank I work at and asked what he would need in order to open an account. I had to look him in the eyes with a straight face, say, "Two pieces of identification," and ask him to put some pants on. FML

#20880767
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37690) - you deserved it (2719)

On 09/14/2013 at 11:04am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43212) - you deserved it (7351)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

#20826835
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49018) - you deserved it (4339)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40944) - you deserved it (27612)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50093) - you deserved it (3992)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

#20779714
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52147) - you deserved it (4296)

On 07/13/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by speechless - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57199) - you deserved it (66114)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: