lillypatter

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Offline (the 09/01/2014 at 6:59pm)

lillypatter

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 754
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lillypatter : ♥ white lips pale face I hate the human race ♥

lillypatter's page activity

Visits<b>Anti_Sora</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 2:46pm<b>wdthompson1</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:15am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 8:37am<b>Ben009</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 10:36am<b>colerean</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 2:12am<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 7:34am<b>Blee864</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 11:14pm<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 5:03am<b>Colourize</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 8:31pm<b>Llamassss</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 1:38pm<b>Nilan</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 4:54am<b>B0SSAHOLIC</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:39am<b>Alexeon</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 7:26pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 8:33pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 10:41am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:47am<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 6:45am<b>lb562</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 5:56pm

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lillypatter's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

by anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

by CallmeEddie / 11/14/2013 at 11:44am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of the special needs teens I work with confessed his love for me. It was cute until he put his erection on my leg and attempted to hump me. FML

by BioChickthcfy / 11/13/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML

by toothache / 05/14/2013 at 8:03am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I did my small part to help the environment by hanging my clothes outside to dry rather than using the dryer. The birds showed their appreciation by crapping on the majority of my clothes. FML

by hitchcock2013 / 05/07/2013 at 1:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, at school, I saw the guy I like at his locker. I decided to run up from behind and surprise him. I ended up accidentally slamming his locker on his fingers. FML

by saxophone911 / 04/13/2013 at 11:52am / United States / Love