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lifesucksbro
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lifesucksbro's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking some clean bedsheets down from the top of the wardrobe. As I pulled the top sheet down, a cat jumped onto my face, claws and all, before falling to the floor and running away. Thing is, I don't own a cat and I have no idea where in the house it has hidden now. FML

#20972130
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39176) - you deserved it (2296)

On 11/27/2013 at 2:08am - animals - by Seriously_Scaredy_Cat - United States

Today, I was searched and questioned at the airport for having an apple. FML

#20971832
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36760) - you deserved it (4110)

On 11/26/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom bitched me out for still being single at age 19, and still not having started a family. She considers this "immoral," yet showed nothing but praise for my sister, who's pregnant at 15 and doesn't know which of three guys is the father. FML

#20960837
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54816) - you deserved it (2250)

On 11/17/2013 at 12:46pm - misc - by failed brood mare (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I tried to storm out of the room during an argument, but walked face-first into our closed sliding glass door. My boyfriend laughed so hard that he had to sit down. Later, we noticed the nose mark I left. He won't let me clean it, because he wants to show it to everyone. FML

Today, I decided to make what I thought was a pretzel recipe. I ended up eating cooked, egg-coated play dough. Literally, homemade Play-Doh. FML

Today, I superglued the sole back into my shoe. Unfortunately, the glue didn't dry as quickly as it said it would on the bottle. The glue seeped through the sole and my foot got superglued to my shoe. FML

#20956277
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37011) - you deserved it (10141)

On 11/13/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by footstuck - United States (North Carolina)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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