Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 01/01/2015 at 5:23am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9281
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About lexxiii : This site makes me happy because I like seeing other people in pain along with me. Always live life to the fullest, though. You never know when it will be gone.

I love kittens, science, and film all in that order.

lexxiii's page activity

Visits<b>JZAMORA777</b> - 18 hours ago<b>punmessiah</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 8:03pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 1:32am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 4:30pm<b>xninix</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 4:16am<b>Red_Brooks</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 4:06pm<b>LieBull2732</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:29pm<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:13am<b>CitricAcid</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:09pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 5:10am<b>rjc490</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 6:54am<b>Perplexed_Aris</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 1:38pm<b>hantu69</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 12:45pm<b>lilferrit</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 3:24pm<b>DolphinLaser23</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 1:15pm<b>apcsox</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 10:56am<b>thunderfucked</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 12:17am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 4:33pm

Fucked!<b>xninix</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 10:16am<b>DolphinLaser23</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:15pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:33pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 4:18pm

lexxiii's FML badges


You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of lexxiii's badges

lexxiii's favorite FMLs

Today, I hired an exterminator to get the roaches out of the house I am renting. I came back from work and went to my bathroom, noticing that he used the plunger to unclog the toilet after he took a dump. After $150, there was shit all over my floor and plunger, and roaches still in my kitchen. FML


I agree, your life sucks (58227) - you deserved it (3646)

On 05/26/2009 at 5:18am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize. It was a man with a speech impediment, and I began imitating him. He was the manager of a store I applied at. He wanted to arrange an interview. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15000) - you deserved it (233742)

On 05/24/2009 at 10:50am - work - by oopsie (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in the middle of walking home when I saw an old woman trying to get away from what looked like a mugger. I go over and try to help her out and get the man off of her, which was successful. Turns out she was having a heart attack and the man was a doctor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45216) - you deserved it (17134)

On 05/07/2009 at 12:52pm - misc - by JuniorDetective (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21021) - you deserved it (45667)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:46pm - kids - by Jon (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (292884) - you deserved it (19736)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was driving to the grocery store with my 7 year-old son. When I was approaching a stop sign, I look next to me and see a guy with a triangle shaped head. I tell my son "Look at the guy with the triangle head." My window was open. So was his. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9034) - you deserved it (69858)

On 05/03/2009 at 9:44am - misc - by mylifesucks123 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was doing a fitness test. Though clumsy, I managed to spin around a bat then dash across a balance beam, run through some tires, and walk across a log floating in water. Pleased with my performance, I walked to the bathroom, tripped on my shoelace, and busted my head on the floor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48306) - you deserved it (5248)

On 04/25/2009 at 5:09am - misc - by Clumsy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was studying for a midterm, so I put my computer on the side of my desk to make more room for my books. My roommate came in while I wasn't paying attention and tackle-hugged me from behind - I fell over, knocking my computer out the window. I live on the 8th floor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59212) - you deserved it (7580)

On 04/24/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by avanti (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on somewhat of a blind date. The date was OK until he tried to spoon feed me. This didn't go over so well. Later, I noticed a strange looking brief case he was carrying. I asked him what it was and he whipped out 5 yoyos and did a yoyo show in the middle of the restaurant. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63485) - you deserved it (6601)

On 04/22/2009 at 1:24am - misc - by 11321 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I used an airplane bathroom. I used a paper seat cover because I didn't want my butt to touch the seat. The seat cover clogged the toilet. I stuck my hand in and fished the seat cover out. I essentially stuck my hand into an airplane toilet because I didn't want my ass to touch the seat. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14409) - you deserved it (69378)

On 04/21/2009 at 5:30am - misc - by Jen (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my girlfriend dropped me off for a class and I accidentally closed my exceptionally baggy pants in the passenger door. She didn't notice and started to drive away. I spent the next fifteen seconds being dragged across rough pavement with my pants around my ankles. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56752) - you deserved it (36156)

On 03/28/2009 at 1:17pm - misc - by enriquegay (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out I won a 20 000 dollar scholarship. After celebrating with my family by jumping around the room for a half-hour, we realized it was addressed to someone else with the same last name. When we called to tell her, she said it was weird because she had received my rejection letter. FML


I agree, your life sucks (184796) - you deserved it (22867)

On 03/14/2009 at 9:44am - money - by stillpoor (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, to ask a boy I really liked to my school's turnabout dance, I gave him a box full of 10 cupcakes that spelled out T-U-R-N-A-B-O-U-T-?. The boy gave the box back a little later. There were two cupcakes left inside. It said N-O. FML


I agree, your life sucks (105476) - you deserved it (11660)

On 02/27/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by justanaccount (woman) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56870) - you deserved it (3577)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:47pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Maryland)

Mselle Risa's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML Pics : The top 4 pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a boring bunch of words thrown at you by a corporate robot. That's true. Corporate robots are the worst. Anyway, the FML Pics app is still being downloaded all over the…

Tuesday 24 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: