About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs
Today, I was walking to a bathroom on campus before class when my professor walked in behind me. There were two urinals in the bathroom, we walked right up next to each other and unzipped our pants in unison. It became so awkward for me, I actually said out loud, "Nope, too awkward" and left. FML
by beetregeneration / 11/16/2016 at 6:47pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/06/2016 at 2:59pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by Gas-pingForAir / 09/19/2016 at 4:59am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by MumMatters / 09/09/2016 at 6:26am / Germany (Hamburg) / Kids
Today, I got a call from my panicking grandmother. I asked her what was going on, and she explained that, “Godzilla doesn’t work.” Not really understanding, I asked her to clarify. “Yes, you know, Godzilla, to use the internet.” FML
by Grandzilla / 09/09/2016 at 12:10am / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Geek
Today, at my new job, I realized I have been spending too much time with just my cat. As I passed some coworkers in the hall, I nodded and gave them the "slow blink of trust" that is used with cats. FML
by CoA / 09/06/2016 at 7:40am / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, I finally addressed why my boyfriend started calling me "love bug" since we haven't used pet names in the entirety of our 2 year relationship. His response? "because I love you but you bug the shit out of me. It seemed appropriate." FML
by Jaided_Genetics / 08/17/2016 at 12:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I am on a 14 hour flight, stuck next to a large man whose rancid body odor is eclipsed only by his constant flatulence, which he loudly blames on me every time. On my other side is his friend who laughs like a moose at everything. There are no empty seats and no-one will trade with me. FML
by IamHM / 07/19/2016 at 2:36pm / United States (New Mexico) / Transportation
by boobswerehere / 07/07/2016 at 3:15am / United States (Nevada) / Kids
Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML
by fuckel4 / 07/01/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
by crybaby / 06/28/2016 at 1:54pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
Today, at my job as a teacher, I saw a student cut another student's hair, I stopped a group of students from eating glue, and I had to tell a student to put away the toy cars he was playing with. I teach high school math. FML
by Courtney / 05/26/2016 at 8:12am / United States / Work
by BenFiggy / 04/21/2016 at 9:28am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
by sorkin15 / 03/24/2016 at 5:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/18/2016 at 8:46pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous