About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.
lexiieeex3's FML badges
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 10/06/2016 at 2:59pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by Gas-pingForAir / 09/19/2016 at 4:59am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by MumMatters / 09/09/2016 at 6:26am / Germany (Hamburg) / Kids
Today, I got a call from my panicking grandmother. I asked her what was going on, and she explained that, “Godzilla doesn’t work.” Not really understanding, I asked her to clarify. “Yes, you know, Godzilla, to use the internet.” FML
by Grandzilla / 09/09/2016 at 12:10am / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Geek
Today, at my new job, I realized I have been spending too much time with just my cat. As I passed some coworkers in the hall, I nodded and gave them the "slow blink of trust" that is used with cats. FML
by CoA / 09/06/2016 at 7:40am / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, I finally addressed why my boyfriend started calling me "love bug" since we haven't used pet names in the entirety of our 2 year relationship. His response? "because I love you but you bug the shit out of me. It seemed appropriate." FML
by Jaided_Genetics / 08/17/2016 at 12:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by boobswerehere / 07/07/2016 at 3:15am / United States (Nevada) / Kids
Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML
by fuckel4 / 07/01/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
by crybaby / 06/28/2016 at 1:54pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
Today, at my job as a teacher, I saw a student cut another student's hair, I stopped a group of students from eating glue, and I had to tell a student to put away the toy cars he was playing with. I teach high school math. FML
by Courtney / 05/26/2016 at 8:12am / United States / Work
by BenFiggy / 04/21/2016 at 9:28am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
by sorkin15 / 03/24/2016 at 5:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/18/2016 at 8:46pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/05/2015 at 11:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
by EnderHorse / 11/05/2015 at 3:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Health
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…