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laniparis

Offline (the 04/14/2015 at 8:43am) | Search for a member

laniparis

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2458
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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laniparis's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 5:32am<b>DawnofDark</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:32pm<b>fluff23</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 12:53am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 6:25am<b>Rinelric1998</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 11:21pm<b>gmian</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 10:34pm<b>Tucking_Fypo</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 8:46am<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 1:44am<b>Sebas11</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 11:26am<b>1243wj</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 2:44pm<b>Starter</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 5:31pm<b>cynicalhumanist</b> - the 11/18/2012 at 5:15pm<b>sigrak0</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 7:06am

laniparis's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of laniparis's badges

laniparis's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML

#21312305
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33832) - you deserved it (3300)

On 12/06/2014 at 12:18am - work - by ring-a-ding-ding (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while giving directions to a blind guy, I accidentally made him walk into a wall. FML

#21261532
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32547) - you deserved it (7708)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:14pm - misc - by camerashyguy - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41139) - you deserved it (3973)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, in astronomy class, a kid used Uranus in a hilarious innuendo. I was the only one who laughed. I also happen to be the teacher. FML

#21260699
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33650) - you deserved it (5702)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:20pm - misc - by immature - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

#21259933
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39893) - you deserved it (2535)

On 09/17/2014 at 8:18am - misc - by makeyourselfathome (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I tried to scare what I thought was a stray cat away from my friend's car in our work parking garage by hitting the panic button on his keys, which did, indeed, make the creature panic. That's when I learned it was not a cat. It was a skunk. FML

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41067) - you deserved it (9524)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37457) - you deserved it (5016)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

#21246787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39183) - you deserved it (3364)

On 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm - kids - by That idiot - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

#21244154
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38589) - you deserved it (3073)

On 08/24/2014 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40353) - you deserved it (4663)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my father tripped over the dog and hit a wall. He was so convinced his arm was broken that we waited for 3 hours in emergency to find out he had a bruise. FML

#21225316
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34026) - you deserved it (2891)

On 07/30/2014 at 11:12pm - misc - by anon - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while working an early shift, I was dressing a wound on a gorgeous guy, when he laughed and pointed out some granny panties next to me on the floor. I guess I forgot to take yesterday's underwear out of my pants before putting them back on this morning. FML

#21223271
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33840) - you deserved it (8810)

On 07/28/2014 at 4:47pm - work - by dorrisdoes - New Zealand

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

#21206318
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45400) - you deserved it (8480)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm - animals - by and god shat (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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