kylie31

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kylie31

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kylie31kylie31
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6298
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About kylie31 : I have always considered myself a reasonably intelligent and pretty confident person (also super modest).

I am not one for writting bio information. I hate bio information. But I have succumbed to peer pressure and have poured myself a glass of wine. Perhaps this glass of wine has sparked something in me to write some silly information under this 'about you' section. I hate wine!

So something about me. I have noticed alot of people write quotes they live by. I hate quotes! Dodgy dumb quotes are dopey. Like I hate statuses that say 'like for like'!!! Do you think the likes of Charles Darwin, Da Vinci, Einstein and Galileao got to where they did from writting 'like for a like'? And no, it wasn't because they didn't have facebook, it was because they weren't braindead shits. Now go forth, live by your own experience and knowledge and invent your own standards to live by. I must mention I do like Dalai Lama quotes- they are good. I like Dalai Lama quotes.

kylie31's page activity

Visits<b>kingdutchhy</b> - 17 hours ago<b>PrinceMO</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 2:28pm<b>Moskaaa7</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 6:23am<b>samanthaelena</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 8:30pm<b>jackroarrr</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 1:09am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 11:11am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 9:06pm<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 3:27pm<b>crazypeach</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 11:05am<b>jgwyh</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 1:02am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 9:31pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 1:46am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:21am<b>mlove2291</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 6:01am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 10:16pm<b>natattck</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 10:02pm<b>dmargolis</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 9:35am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 11:03pm

Fucked!<b>kingdutchhy</b> - 11 hours ago<b>jgwyh</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 9:32am<b>Moskaaa7</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 12:16am<b>lambda</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 5:42am<b>dominguez89</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:36am<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 6:49am<b>lesnotbehonest</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:55pm<b>supermarxiste75</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 10:45pm<b>Phat_Tony</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 4:46am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 3:35am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 7:43am<b>s1s1</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 1:18am<b>Bleublancrouge</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 1:28pm<b>Montiphelia</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 2:44am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 10:43pm<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 2:47pm<b>yayhoo16</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 3:10am<b>DrProfessor777</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:39pm

kylie31's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of kylie31's badges

kylie31's favorite FMLs

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm / India (Delhi) / Intimacy

Today, I pulled a piece of dental floss out of my ass. How it got there is one of life's great mysteries. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2015 at 3:42am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2015 at 1:58am / Finland / Work

Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so I went outside and screamed obscenities at the top of my lungs, before heading back inside. The police then showed up to investigate complaints of a "raving lunatic" in the area. FML

by RavingLunatic / 05/01/2015 at 6:17pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

by henrylikestreats / 04/30/2015 at 2:04pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

by a critically injured shitehawk / 04/25/2015 at 6:34am / United Kingdom (York) / Love

Today, my roommate and I are so broke, we resorted to going to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting just for the refreshments. FML

by jamongrande / 04/17/2015 at 11:50am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I got headbutted for saying that Nutella is overrated. FML

by jamisbetter / 04/11/2015 at 8:34am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I explained to my sister that the reason she isn't getting job offers is probably because her résumé is in Comic Sans and contains TXT language and a lot of typos. She thanked me for my help by calling me a "clueless horse-fucker" and telling me to shut my mouth. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2015 at 2:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about Zayne Malik leaving One Direction, how devastating it is, and what it means for their future. As a pacifist, I've never had to struggle so hard to not beat the piss out of people and hurl their broken remains out a window. FML

by Anonymous / 03/25/2015 at 3:00pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

by ~__~ / 03/20/2015 at 5:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2015 at 8:04pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumb up. FML

by fxck / 02/04/2015 at 2:28pm / Work

Today, in the middle of my haircut, the hairdresser went into labor. They never finished cutting it. FML