Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kylie31

Online | Search for a member

kylie31

160Fucked!

kylie31kylie31
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4289
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About kylie31 : Hi
I'm 24 years of age, I love video games, Tolkien, Star Wars, DR Who... stuff like that.

kylie31's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 10:00pm<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:52pm<b>mrqqqqqqsoup7</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 12:16pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 9:18am<b>nunes36</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:07am<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:40am<b>DOMEinic</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 11:38am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 9:14am<b>koganti</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 6:42am<b>khoov19</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 2:34am<b>MrRondo</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:55pm<b>JDub1031</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 9:45am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 7:05am<b>Chinhull</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 10:18pm<b>hare</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 9:40am<b>AdrianFoo21</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:15am<b>Lars93</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:00am<b>minhas6096</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 7:39pm

Fucked!<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 12:11am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 7:11pm<b>Chinhull</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:49am<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 5:15am<b>AngusEcrivain</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 9:03am<b>pokysmalls</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:21am<b>SexyAnonOnTumblr</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 7:29pm<b>Zee_Mills</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 12:43am<b>jogihoppa8343</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 4:32pm<b>MrsJellyBean</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:11am<b>Teeleebabyy</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 7:11am<b>decimater</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 9:10pm<b>thatoneguy1111</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 12:11pm<b>je83185</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 2:21pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:41pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 5:10pm<b>hgp285</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 6:50pm<b>queensassygoat</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 5:59am

kylie31's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

See all of kylie31's badges

kylie31's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML

#21457342
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24550) - you deserved it (8951)

On 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm - work - by BarhydtBran - United States (California)

Today, I bought some pricey lipstick for a date tonight. An hour after putting it on, my lips are so swollen, I look like a blow-up sex doll. FML

#21453135
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21035) - you deserved it (2873)

On 08/07/2015 at 12:36pm - health - by blow me (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my laziness hit a new low when I tried closing my bedroom door using my mind. FML

#21446894
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10930) - you deserved it (19235)

On 07/25/2015 at 4:33am - misc - by elovan - United States (Iowa)

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML

#21445322
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10873) - you deserved it (47247)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, my religious friend and I ended up having wild sex in the back of his mom's minivan. We got interrupted by a priest knocking at our window. Well played God, well played. FML

#21444515
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28007) - you deserved it (7726)

On 07/20/2015 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by Marika - United States (California)

Today, my wife paid a man with a fake crystal and an even faker accent to investigate the creakiness of our apartment complex floors. $300 later, she told me he'd found a "sinkhole of chi energy" and that the building may collapse if we don't pay him to disperse it. I want a divorce. FML

#21425895
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29043) - you deserved it (3191)

On 06/14/2015 at 11:37am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Croatia (Grad Zagreb)

Today, it was the first time a guy has shown any interest in me by calling me pretty. I was so shocked that instead of saying thank you, I hid behind the nearest object and promptly giggle-snorted. FML

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

#21406764
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20659) - you deserved it (38067)

On 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I pulled a piece of dental floss out of my ass. How it got there is one of life's great mysteries. FML

#21403757
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32098) - you deserved it (4733)

On 05/03/2015 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

#21403720
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29464) - you deserved it (4569)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Finland

Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so I went outside and screamed obscenities at the top of my lungs, before heading back inside. The police then showed up to investigate complaints of a "raving lunatic" in the area. FML

#21403035
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19899) - you deserved it (22820)

On 05/01/2015 at 6:17pm - work - by RavingLunatic (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32616) - you deserved it (2793)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my roommate and I are so broke, we resorted to going to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting just for the refreshments. FML

#21395180
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28391) - you deserved it (3689)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:50am - money - by jamongrande - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: