Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

krisseyDJ

Online | Search for a member

krisseyDJ

14Fucked!

krisseyDJkrisseyDJ
  • Town/Country : Pasco, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 July 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 348
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

krisseyDJ's page activity

Visits<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:33am<b>recycledtitanium</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 4:15pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 10:27pm<b>FireDemon_101</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:48pm<b>Zee_Mills</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 7:40pm<b>ronenlior</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 12:08am<b>metalscales</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:06am<b>marshm610</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 9:36pm<b>killjoyx</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:10pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:23am<b>TheDude992</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 3:37am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 4:07pm<b>IndicaPaincakes</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 2:50am<b>sam882</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 3:15pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:44pm<b>404usernotfound</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:24pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:58am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 8:39pm

Fucked!<b>Zee_Mills</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:39am<b>metalscales</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 9:04pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 1:45am<b>dk1991</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 3:13pm<b>IndicaPaincakes</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 2:31am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 1:38am<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 12:28am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 6:03pm<b>Gillett</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 6:08am<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 7:04am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:30pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 7:32pm<b>briang959</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 7:06pm<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 8:22pm

krisseyDJ's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of krisseyDJ's badges

krisseyDJ's favorite FMLs

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23759) - you deserved it (6113)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, my boss bitched me out for violating workplace privacy, after he found an FML post from last year that eerily resembled a situation that happened the same year. He thought I posted it and twisted things to make him look like an idiot. I've never posted here in my life. FML

#21458477
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25172) - you deserved it (2317)

On 08/20/2015 at 1:48pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. When I went to change into tight jeans which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled: "It's the mommy show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

#21454009
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22862) - you deserved it (2085)

On 08/09/2015 at 8:37pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, on my second day at my new job, a customer called my manager with a complaint about me. He said I put the cheese "upside down" on his sandwich, and that made it taste bad. FML

Today, a revolving door got the better of me. I made it into the crowded lobby, unlike my skirt. Bad day to wear a thong. FML

#21448563
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26766) - you deserved it (3248)

On 07/28/2015 at 1:18pm - misc - by Oopsie - United States (Vermont)

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML

#21445322
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10872) - you deserved it (47247)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I found out my mom recently stopped taking her medication. I came home to find she'd shot my dog because she thought he was possessed by the devil. FML

#21442016
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38831) - you deserved it (1955)

On 07/15/2015 at 11:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

#21439737
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28108) - you deserved it (7721)

On 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, instead of canceling for the third consecutive time due to work-related reasons, my boyfriend sent his twin brother on our date. They both thought I wouldn't notice. FML

#21438625
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26944) - you deserved it (1864)

On 07/08/2015 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while reading my girlfriends kid's a story, her daughter started pouring a tiny watering can on my head. When I asked her what she was doing, she said, "Watering your head so your hair grows back". I'm twenty-seven. FML

#21437640
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24546) - you deserved it (2180)

On 07/06/2015 at 10:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after constant avoidance, I saw the man who slept with my mother and caused my parents to get divorced. I desperately wanted to punch him in the face, but instead I had to smile and shake his hand as he gave me my diploma. FML

#21431164
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36337) - you deserved it (2263)

On 06/24/2015 at 1:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I had to call a parent and tell them that their special needs daughter is pregnant. FML

#21430924
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32924) - you deserved it (1954)

On 06/23/2015 at 11:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband let my 8-year-old twins play with handcuffs. I thought my husband was pretending he had lost the key but after 4 hours, he walked in with his head down and said, "I've made a terrible mistake honey." FML

#21429657
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25966) - you deserved it (2303)

On 06/21/2015 at 5:37pm - kids - by hfs palm - United States

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

#21429349
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25550) - you deserved it (2993)

On 06/21/2015 at 2:04am - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML

#21417851
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30529) - you deserved it (2755)

On 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: