About krez :
I am an adult, although I don't always act like one.
I am a single parent and a part-time gamer.
I am a computer programmer, a scientist, and a super genius.
I am a minister and an atheist, which in retrospect is kind of funny.
I am only here for the schadenfreude, although you can message me if that is your thing.
About krez :
krez's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
krez's favorite FMLs
by insomnitude / 03/05/2011 at 1:55am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
by failed / 02/23/2011 at 5:06am / Switzerland (Vaud) / Intimacy
Today, I started my community service at the dog pound. I like animals so I thought it would be a good place to do it. As I arrived they were throwing dogs that had been euthanized into a dump truck to be taken to a landfill. That was my job for the day. FML
by Anonymous / 02/21/2011 at 10:15am / United States (North Carolina) / Work
Today, I was driving with my parents while explaining that young people like myself are better drivers because we have better reflexes. My explanation was suddently interrupted with the sound of me crashing the car against a parked car. FML
by superdriver / 02/07/2011 at 12:46pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Transportation
Today, while driving I made a fake phone call with my fake boyfriend, making him sound amazing to my friends who were in the car with me. Until the red and blue flashing lights pulled up behind us. My fake boyfriend cost me $160 in real fines. FML
by Anonymous / 08/07/2010 at 7:36pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation
Today, I went to an elementary school for volunteer work. I was asked to read to a group of kids during one of the classes. Before I started reading, a girl raised her hand and asked me if I had a boyfriend and if I was single. I asked her why and she said "My daddy wanted to know." I'm 16. FML
by LaRae17 / 08/04/2010 at 10:40am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by iKaite / 01/15/2010 at 2:56am / United Kingdom / Kids
Today, I was watching Star Wars : Attack of the Clones, and Yoda was using the force to move a heavy object. While in the middle of my loungeroom, I instinctively put my hand up to use the force to help him, infront of my father and sister. My sister will never let me live it down. FML
by Fuzzy / 01/08/2010 at 2:56am / Australia (New South Wales) / Geek
by Anonymous / 06/29/2009 at 3:52pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by fartmaster / 04/22/2009 at 3:10pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Fitz / 04/12/2009 at 9:53am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML
by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals
Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I hear him in the hall I shout out "come on, don't be shy, bring that cock in here right now!". A voice replies: "he's gone out to get some bread". It was my mother-in-law. FML
by Tinker-Bell / 11/20/2008 at 10:41pm / Intimacy
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and… Today, my dad came to pick me up early for the Christmas break. He walked in on me cleaning all 19… Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini…