krez

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krez

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6198
  • Number of comments : 271
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About krez :
I am an adult, although I don't always act like one.

I am a single parent and a part-time gamer.

I am a computer programmer, a scientist, and a super genius.

I am a minister and an atheist, which in retrospect is kind of funny.

I am only here for the schadenfreude, although you can message me if that is your thing.

krez's page activity

Visits<b>Chiaroscuro</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 2:38am<b>samsterling</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 9:28pm<b>NoBothersForMe</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 12:49pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 3:06pm<b>CommentKing207</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:24pm<b>oops6663</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 4:25pm<b>MommyTesta</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 8:43pm<b>2potato4u</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:55pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 2:44pm<b>nonamebadger</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 1:17pm<b>rawr_nigga</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 6:50pm<b>91hayek</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:42pm<b>redwolf213</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 2:55pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 5:54am<b>chaoss10</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 2:54pm<b>fenellaisacute</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 1:16pm<b>HeartYou101</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 4:32am<b>gabylikescheese</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 11:54am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 9:06pm

krez's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of krez's badges

krez's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that every time my girlfriend takes a big dump, she pretends as if she's giving birth and screams uncontrollably. I just moved in with her. FML

by poopydaddy / 05/03/2013 at 7:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML

by Jes_jes18 / 05/02/2013 at 2:27pm / United States / Love

Today, my future father-in-law showed everyone a picture of his poop because it was "shaped like a banana." My fiancé's whole family thought it was funny and "looked more like a banana than last time." FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 11:04am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 11:55am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents finally got married. At the after-party, my mother got drunk and informed me that even though she and my father were now married, it doesn't change the fact that I'm still a bastard. FML

by SierraCheyenne / 04/29/2013 at 9:57pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

by Skyler / 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML

by BIGCHEIFAAA / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my husband showed up late to my mother's funeral. He swaggered in, happily finishing off a half-eaten taco. His excuse for why he was so cheerful: "She was an in-law, honey." Good to know I married a piece of shit in disguise. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2013 at 1:30pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

by kindergarten teacher / 03/23/2013 at 9:25am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I tossed half a sausage to a dog sitting beside a park bench. It wasn't until he lunged for it and dragged the man beside him off of the bench that I realized it was a seeing eye dog. FML

by SolaceInRage / 03/20/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2013 at 6:37pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML

by anony / 02/27/2013 at 8:49am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my mother's funeral, as everyone was around her casket for the viewing, my 5-year-old son in cluelessness of what was going on shouted, "Grandma is more fun when she isn't sleeping." Everyone cried. FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 6:00pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML

by soaked / 02/25/2013 at 2:16pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids