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kmiller194

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kmiller194

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  • Number of visits : 802
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kmiller194's page activity

Visits<b>GemmaAnne</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:03pm<b>InfamousRaider</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 3:47am

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50 favourites

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kmiller194's favorite FMLs

Today, I crawled into bed with my boyfriend. He was snoring loudly which is how I knew he was passed out cold. Once I was under the blanket next to him, he slowly turned over, stared me straight in the face and said, "I have to kill you". Then started snoring again. FML

Today, while I was eating cereal, my mother thought it would be appropriate to grab the bowl and start spoon-feeding me while making airplane noises, again. I'm 19. FML

Today, I was in the shower, oblivious to the outside world, when four police officers who had apparently been banging at my door, entered by force. They were doing a bust on a weed farm and got the wrong house. FML

#20811532
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52961) - you deserved it (3205)

On 07/30/2013 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML

#20811460
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40062) - you deserved it (13197)

On 07/30/2013 at 12:42pm - misc - by kiwichick4life (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I finished the kayak I have been working on for four years. I can't get it out of my basement. FML

#20811304
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40014) - you deserved it (23417)

On 07/30/2013 at 10:13am - misc - by kayak probs - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

#20810724
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57075) - you deserved it (8904)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by JustSomeGuy - United States (Texas)

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

#20809554
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62600) - you deserved it (5426)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by PrettyScared (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML

#20809292
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61480) - you deserved it (9134)

On 07/29/2013 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

#20809215
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51332) - you deserved it (7572)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:35am - love - by confusedmofo - Indonesia

Today, I finished off the last of the BBQ chips in the house. When my 6-year-old sister found out about it, she started screaming, then pulled down her pants and peed on the kitchen floor. My parents, after witnessing the whole thing, bitched me out for upsetting her. FML

#20806438
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55158) - you deserved it (4252)

On 07/27/2013 at 2:31pm - kids - by poopiter (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend's boss. She was wondering if he was okay, since he hasn't shown up to work for the past two weeks. Now I'm wondering where he's been going when he leaves the house each day. FML

#20799589
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59877) - you deserved it (3979)

On 07/23/2013 at 3:03pm - love - by Hesintrouble (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I sold ice cream to a group of kids. One of them looked sad, because he was the only one who couldn't buy any, so I gave him some for free. Apparently, he was allergic to something in it, and ended up being rushed to the hospital. FML

#20799539
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51529) - you deserved it (6913)

On 07/23/2013 at 2:28pm - work - by Snarty (man) - United States

Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML

#20799401
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59565) - you deserved it (5659)

On 07/23/2013 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by MenstruallyFrustrated - United States (Arizona)

Today, we got a new employee at work. I said hi, and told her that if she needed help figuring out our computer system, then to give me a call. She promptly accused me of sexual harassment and filed a complaint against me. FML

Today, I went to the Giants game. During the seventh inning stretch they showed me on the jumbo-tron. It was just in time for the entire stadium to see me pull a tampon out of my purse. FML

#20799228
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61549) - you deserved it (8021)

On 07/23/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by GiantsFan13 - United States (Colorado)



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