kmaheynoway

Search for a member

Offline (the 06/04/2015 at 5:52am)

kmaheynoway

13Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 953
  • Number of comments : 96
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About kmaheynoway : How did you find me? I swear I didn't do it! Unless I did something you like, in that case it was completely me.

kmaheynoway's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 1:14am<b>deejflat</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 2:22pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 4:40pm<b>TheBlackMagister</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 8:52pm<b>DragonflyM</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 11:54am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 7:56pm<b>sarahcrossan</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 1:30am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 7:18pm<b>fmlallthetyme</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 4:09pm<b>First_JOman</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 1:24pm<b>mlwalker88</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 11:48am<b>LindseyTheMoose</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 10:43am<b>DragonDude</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 10:30am<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:56am<b>hashbrown97</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:39am<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:04am<b>ToxicPlant</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 11:51pm<b>tintarroja</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:08am

Fucked!<b>Secret_Ninjaa</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 6:16pm<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 3:08am<b>sorainu</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 2:21pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:11am<b>OhYouMad</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 5:09am<b>ToxicPlant</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 3:10am<b>KyokoSakuraChan</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 12:14am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 12:11am<b>AMcM</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:53pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 7:05pm<b>dragonkisses28</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:04am<b>ShekinahNicole</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 8:56am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 8:06am

kmaheynoway's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of kmaheynoway's badges

kmaheynoway's favorite FMLs

Today, my roommate bitched me out over my "OCD" driving the water bill up. She takes hour-long showers, but apparently me flushing after peeing "wasteful" and a sign of a neurological disorder. FML

by she has dumbcuntitis / 06/03/2015 at 2:03am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that a classmate and I have the same glasses. To prove it, I tried bending his glasses, since mine are flexible and can bend. I snapped his glasses in half. FML

by smartass / 05/29/2015 at 10:31pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, for our anniversary, I had made a small treasure hunt for my boyfriend, tying roses with notes of poetry to lampposts across campus to lead him to where we would have a romantic dinner. He couldn't find it because people had stolen the roses, or simply ripped them to pieces and thrown them away. FML

by Headless / 05/29/2015 at 9:04am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Love

Today, I learned one of life's great lessons: it is possible to squeeze a Ketchup bottle so hard that the plastic breaks and everything lands on your face. FML

by sassy_girl144 / 05/29/2015 at 6:58am / United Kingdom (West Berkshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, after being with my fiance for almost a decade, my future mother-in-law has been accusing me of being a gold digger because we want to buy a house together. She has conveniently forgotten her son was out of work for two years and I supported the both of us. FML

Today, one of my regulars came up to my car in the parking lot. We talked through the window while I put on my makeup. He then asked for a hug because he won't be in for two weeks. I obliged and he was kind enough to slide his hand between my legs. He then gave me $50 not to tell his wife. FML

Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML

Today, I sleep during the day because I work nights. My neighbors have a very loud wedding and reception in their backyard including a live mariachi band. FML

by Vlen / 05/23/2015 at 10:38pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of a week showed me her talent: shooting milk out of her vagina across the room. Goodbye dairy products. FML

by zzarzzur / 05/22/2015 at 2:55am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my flatmate wears my underwear. FML

by anon / 05/21/2015 at 10:22pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I missed my bus. But it didn't miss me. I've been in the hospital for 8 hours with a broken leg. FML

by FrickingBusDrivers / 05/21/2015 at 9:55pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML

by HiddlePuff / 05/14/2015 at 8:42am / Australia / Work

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

by ajodasdojsad / 03/21/2015 at 11:12am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from the ICU. Apparently, my boyfriend has been there for 3 days and I'm the only person who didn't know. Even my parents have been to see him. FML

by quietecho95 / 03/20/2015 at 11:40am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, my best friend confessed to having feelings for me. I've been in love with her for a long time, so I was ecstatic. She doesn't see herself ever going out with me, though, because she's a couple of inches taller and can't imagine herself "towering" over her man. FML

by falling short / 03/20/2015 at 11:26am / India (Maharashtra) / Love