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kmaheynoway

Offline (the 03/23/2015 at 1:05pm) | Search for a member

kmaheynoway

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 239
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About kmaheynoway : How did you find me? I swear I didn't do it! Unless I did something you like, in that case it was completely me.

kmaheynoway's page activity

Visits<b>Nordrag</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 3:56am<b>ODST_Panda</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 5:24pm<b>sk8rdud3</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 2:55am<b>dragonkisses28</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 2:04am<b>maisha111</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 1:31am<b>dontlookman</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 9:14pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:55pm<b>constipation</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:24pm<b>Kellis52</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 1:22pm<b>llalala</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 5:17am<b>brytonhansen</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 5:11pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 2:27am<b>Kramer1998</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 1:24pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 12:51am<b>ChristopherLP49</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 12:20am<b>loganthoren</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:01pm<b>Nubbington1402</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 4:54pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 2:13pm

Liked!<b>dragonkisses28</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:04am<b>ShekinahNicole</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 8:56am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 8:06am

kmaheynoway's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of kmaheynoway's badges

kmaheynoway's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

#21378887
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28050) - you deserved it (3397)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:12am - misc - by ajodasdojsad (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I got a call from the ICU. Apparently, my boyfriend has been there for 3 days and I'm the only person who didn't know. Even my parents have been to see him. FML

#21378357
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30089) - you deserved it (4758)

On 03/20/2015 at 11:40am - health - by quietecho95 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my best friend confessed to having feelings for me. I've been in love with her for a long time, so I was ecstatic. She doesn't see herself ever going out with me, though, because she's a couple of inches taller and can't imagine herself "towering" over her man. FML

#21378350
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31490) - you deserved it (2463)

On 03/20/2015 at 11:26am - love - by falling short (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML

#21376174
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22458) - you deserved it (12227)

On 03/17/2015 at 3:14am - animals - by ilovecharliesheen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend complimented me on how he liked my freckles down below. I didn't have the heart to tell him that they were just razor rash. FML

#21360762
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29374) - you deserved it (3997)

On 02/22/2015 at 12:15am - intimacy - by awkward.. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

#21360688
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33793) - you deserved it (7946)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today, alone on Valentine's day, I decided to eat chocolate and watch romantic comedies in bed. I had an allergic reaction to the chocolate which sent me to the ER. FML

#21356363
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31428) - you deserved it (3156)

On 02/14/2015 at 11:07pm - misc - by Rubyscooby212 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35651) - you deserved it (4969)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

#21355947
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29409) - you deserved it (9069)

On 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, I found out someone, most likely my psycho ex, has been posing as me on local interest websites, trolling a load of people, and giving them my address so they can come fight me. I found this out when a gentleman showed up at my house wanting to beat me shitless. FML

#21355802
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29315) - you deserved it (1887)

On 02/14/2015 at 7:14am - health - by u wot? (man) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, my youngest daughter finally started using the toilet on her own. That is, until her older sister showed her the South Park episode where someone gets their intestines sucked out by flushing the toilet. Now she won't go anywhere near the bathroom. FML

#21355782
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31491) - you deserved it (3179)

On 02/14/2015 at 4:46am - kids - by Investing in Toilet Seatbelts - United States (Nevada)

Today, my friend told me she wanted to get pregnant. I thought that was good news, but then she said she wanted my boyfriend to be the father of her baby. FML

#21355556
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34581) - you deserved it (2326)

On 02/13/2015 at 8:43pm - misc - by DumbFace714 - United States (California)

Today, I was let go from my balloon-selling job at the zoo. They put a new monkey cage in my designated spot. I was literally fired so a monkey could take my place. FML

#15445630
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36302) - you deserved it (4744)

On 03/23/2011 at 7:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML

#5407615
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38228) - you deserved it (15381)

On 09/22/2009 at 12:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML

#5276065
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61904) - you deserved it (3555)

On 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by benander (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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