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kimmi5

Offline (the 01/17/2015 at 9:36am) | Search for a member

kimmi5

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4259
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kimmi5 : I enjoy FML and read fmls during my down time. I usually don't comment ever. I like to keep to myself mostly. If I look a little young, the picture is not of me but of my little sister. Thanks for taking the time to read about me.

kimmi5's page activity

Visits<b>Fennex3</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 4:05pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 9:00pm<b>erichanoki</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 6:23pm<b>Shadowsin</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 4:21pm<b>olpally</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 1:16am<b>obeykiddsmalls</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 4:46pm<b>greaterdane</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 9:07am<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 9:55pm<b>allstarrider</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 5:27pm<b>PleasantDino</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 7:11am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:10am<b>xdadev</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 12:18am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 12:55pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 2:13pm<b>DissyDemon</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 11:53pm<b>southernbelle_rn</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 10:33pm<b>fancypotato</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:26am<b>dmoran20</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 8:06pm

Liked!<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 2:47am

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kimmi5's favorite FMLs

Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML

#21313160
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38480) - you deserved it (3270)

On 12/07/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I snooped around my parents' room looking for hidden Christmas presents. The only hidden things I found was a whip, two ball gags, several other sex toys, and a load of newspaper clippings about the JFK assassination. What the fuck? FML

#21312961
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21243) - you deserved it (34016)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:10am - misc - by .__. (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML

#21312925
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29897) - you deserved it (5913)

On 12/07/2014 at 1:15am - misc - by Gassy and sassy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

#21312768
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40010) - you deserved it (2258)

On 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML

#21312671
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31626) - you deserved it (2981)

On 12/06/2014 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his god-damn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML

#21312556
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29093) - you deserved it (8238)

On 12/06/2014 at 1:23pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while driving home, I swerved to avoid turning a duck and her babies into roadkill. Another car was coming around a sharp bend at the time and swerved to avoid hitting me. In the end, we both ran our cars off the road, and he took out several ducks in the process. FML

#21312517
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28114) - you deserved it (7190)

On 12/06/2014 at 12:04pm - misc - by newly passed, newly grassed (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I went to dinner at my parents' house. I was going to surprise them by introducing them to my new boyfriend. They decided to surprise me too, by inviting my ex to the dinner. Everyone was surprised tonight. FML

#21312253
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34918) - you deserved it (2483)

On 12/05/2014 at 10:35pm - love - by Michelle - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house to break up with him. When I got there, I got sent on a scavenger hunt that ended with him proposing to me. FML

#21312092
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36677) - you deserved it (5973)

On 12/05/2014 at 4:13pm - love - by hh - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I woke up feeling awful and decided to make myself a nice egg omelette with bacon, toast and fresh fruit. As I went to eat it, I stubbed my toe and dropped it all on the floor. My dogs were very happy about that. FML

#21312082
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28537) - you deserved it (2796)

On 12/05/2014 at 4:00pm - misc - by Dani (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42364) - you deserved it (2992)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got a letter in the mail from corporate saying that I'm being demoted because I don't work enough hours. I also got a text from my boss congratulating me on making the best sales numbers for November. FML

Today, my boyfriend brought me to a restaurant on a surprise date. I guess he didn't know that my ex-boyfriend now works there, and that he would be our waiter for the evening. FML

#21311019
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31868) - you deserved it (3013)

On 12/03/2014 at 9:49pm - love - by maddieex - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend brought me to a restaurant on a surprise date. I guess he didn't know that my ex-boyfriend now works there, and that he would be our waiter for the evening. FML

#21311019
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31868) - you deserved it (3013)

On 12/03/2014 at 9:49pm - love - by maddieex - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned I'm allergic to the 5-month-old kitten we got 3 days ago. It loves me, follows me everywhere and sleeps on my lap in the evenings. FML

#21310909
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31456) - you deserved it (3297)

On 12/03/2014 at 6:24pm - animals - by crazy cat lady - United Kingdom (Coventry)



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