khaoticpanda

Search for a member

Offline (the 03/22/2016 at 12:48am)

khaoticpanda

240Fucked!

khaoticpandakhaoticpanda
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7027
  • Number of comments : 187
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About khaoticpanda : USAF Client Systems Personnel

khaoticpanda's page activity

Visits<b>2simz</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 2:08pm<b>lost7702</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 2:28pm<b>Oliveisthenewora</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 4:12pm<b>MM100</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 9:33am<b>Mons</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 2:42am<b>slt36537</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 10:40pm<b>bobthenob</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 7:56am<b>vreid</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 9:55am<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 11:25am<b>jtorgey84</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 11:51am<b>dannnngthatsux</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 5:35pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 9:51am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 9:33am<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 1:22am<b>thinlinetele</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 11:39pm<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:09pm<b>kporter26</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 2:10pm<b>H4H</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:58pm

Fucked!<b>dannnngthatsux</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 11:36pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 3:52pm<b>thinlinetele</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 5:38am<b>miss_fluffybutt</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 9:50pm<b>dom_g</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 6:41am<b>LavenderSessions</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 6:05pm<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 4:59pm<b>Wiringify</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 1:44am<b>annihil8or</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 9:09pm<b>moocowmilk0</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 7:54pm<b>lukeDAduke157</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 4:45pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 3:14pm<b>olliebush123</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 1:20pm<b>bleu85</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 12:48pm<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 8:20am<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 7:42am<b>papygeorges</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 5:50am<b>mpineda_57</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 4:45am

khaoticpanda's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of khaoticpanda's badges

khaoticpanda's favorite FMLs

Today, I received a string of blank texts from an unknown number. When I asked who it was, I got a list of every place I've been over the last three days. I'm scared to leave the house. FML

by liLbob6598 / 01/09/2012 at 9:34pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was surprised that my husband suggested we take a shower together to save water. He also suggested we should wear our bathing suits so we don't have to see each others "privates." FML

by anonymous / 01/08/2012 at 7:24am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to discipline my two year old son. Whenever I do this, he starts pointing and imitating me, and I can't help but laugh. This explains why he never listens to me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2012 at 12:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

by Aly / 12/09/2011 at 10:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I went camping and shared a tent with this girl I have been sleeping with here and there for a year. To impress her, I popped a certain male enhancement supplement. Thirty minutes later I found out she was on her period. What a long night. FML

by johnnydoe6969 / 11/20/2011 at 6:51pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

by Tyler / 11/19/2011 at 3:05am / United States / Intimacy

Today, as a support worker, I spent 45 minutes making various attempts to calm a violent autistic kid. Just as soon as I was sure the crisis was over, he beat me as hard as he could with the "Things I Can Do When I'm Mad" book I'd given him. FML

by metallifreak44 / 11/14/2011 at 8:37am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

by Anonymous / 11/05/2011 at 8:04pm / Reserved / Intimacy

Today, I went to the doctor for a physical. I've been sitting in the doctor's bathroom for 10 minutes now, trying to think of how to tell him I accidentally tripped and spilled my urine sample on the carpet. FML

by socal000 / 10/20/2011 at 8:04am / United States / Health

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids

Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML

by pokeballbra / 10/17/2011 at 1:44am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, while taking a shower, my back hair caused so much friction against the bar of soap, it stuck for a good second before coming free. FML

by soapy / 10/01/2011 at 12:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I used a public restroom with very shiny floors. So shiny, in fact, that I could see a clear reflection of the person in the next stall. I'm pretty sure they could see me too. FML

by anonymous / 10/01/2011 at 10:18am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to find my first message on Facebook. When I was reaching the bottom, I saw a message from my old crush. It contained a paragraph confessing her love for me and asking me to write back. Don't know how I missed that one. FML

by lostlove / 09/30/2011 at 10:57pm / United States (Missouri) / Love