About kfchicken : suhh dude?
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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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kfchicken's favorite FMLs
by just-a-fat-cat / 05/02/2016 at 11:25pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals
Today, my girlfriend dumped me by text for another man while I was at work. While I worked the drive-thru, a customer noticed me choking back my tears and said "I'd be cryin' too if I worked your dead-end job." FML
by fuck off, for real / 04/03/2016 at 9:26am / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, I got my phone back after bringing it in to get a crack in the screen repaired. The crack is fixed, but now the touch screen doesn't work and it won't connect to the Internet. I essentially paid to have my phone broken even more. FML
by Anonymous / 03/27/2016 at 10:36am / United States (New York) / Money
by IhadToTakeCareOfTraumatizedFish / 03/03/2016 at 12:32am / United States (Texas) / Work
Today, my psycho ex defaced my car. She didn't key it or slash my tires. She posted "TRUMP 2016" bumper stickers all over it. I don't know what glue they use, but it's been 2 hours and I haven't gotten any of them off. FML
by Baegel / 03/01/2016 at 8:52pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/23/2016 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was given the following pearls of wisdom: "My grandmother always told me, if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. Anyway, she was a cunt and so are you." Thanks, dad. Thanks. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2015 at 11:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, while changing my daughter's diaper, I lifted up her butt to wipe her, which coincidentally caused her to fart. I hadn't wiped her yet so the force of air caused poop to fly at me at high speed, landing on my chest and face. My husband burst out laughing, saying, "You've been ass-blasted!" FML
by coolest_mom / 11/25/2015 at 1:00am / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by WinnerWinnerNotEatingDinner / 11/16/2015 at 1:44am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, while at a party playing Truth or Dare, I found out my best friend fantasizes about having sex with my 51 year old mother. The rest of the guys at the party then nodded in agreement and thus spawned a group conversation about how "screwable" my mom is. FML
by Anonymous / 11/02/2015 at 3:01am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/18/2015 at 1:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money
by Peter Steele love / 10/17/2015 at 8:49pm / United Kingdom (North Somerset) / Intimacy
Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2015 at 12:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by biggs sprhro / 10/10/2015 at 12:25am / United States (Ohio) / Love