kfchicken

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kfchicken

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1227
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kfchicken : suhh dude?

kfchicken's page activity

Visits<b>CookieStealer</b> - yesterday at 12:59pm<b>Ungrateful_Imp</b> - yesterday at 11:38am<b>tetchyowl06624</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 1:06am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 1:32pm<b>ryannstevenn</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 3:35am<b>swenny_xoxo</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:40pm<b>journeyboots</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 6:42pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 10:57pm<b>Inspire129</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 8:10pm<b>kuzzy00</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 10:35pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 10:13pm<b>gradyx840</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 1:26am<b>Zomninja</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 11:01am<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 2:27am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 3:58am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 8:58pm<b>Bquillero16</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 3:53am<b>AmIReallyRenee</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 9:10am

Fucked!<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 5:39am<b>bearin</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 4:09am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:06am

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kfchicken's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed my cat was making a loud weezing noise when trying to breathe, so I rushed him to the vet's. $250.00 worth of tests later, he's fine. Just really fat. FML

by just-a-fat-cat / 05/02/2016 at 11:25pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend dumped me by text for another man while I was at work. While I worked the drive-thru, a customer noticed me choking back my tears and said "I'd be cryin' too if I worked your dead-end job." FML

by fuck off, for real / 04/03/2016 at 9:26am / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, I got my phone back after bringing it in to get a crack in the screen repaired. The crack is fixed, but now the touch screen doesn't work and it won't connect to the Internet. I essentially paid to have my phone broken even more. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2016 at 10:36am / United States (New York) / Money

Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML

by IhadToTakeCareOfTraumatizedFish / 03/03/2016 at 12:32am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my psycho ex defaced my car. She didn't key it or slash my tires. She posted "TRUMP 2016" bumper stickers all over it. I don't know what glue they use, but it's been 2 hours and I haven't gotten any of them off. FML

by Baegel / 03/01/2016 at 8:52pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that I will be leaving for the US Marine Corps in June, and the presidential election is in November. I could potentially be serving with Trump as my Commander-in-Chief. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2016 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was given the following pearls of wisdom: "My grandmother always told me, if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. Anyway, she was a cunt and so are you." Thanks, dad. Thanks. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2015 at 11:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while changing my daughter's diaper, I lifted up her butt to wipe her, which coincidentally caused her to fart. I hadn't wiped her yet so the force of air caused poop to fly at me at high speed, landing on my chest and face. My husband burst out laughing, saying, "You've been ass-blasted!" FML

by coolest_mom / 11/25/2015 at 1:00am / Kids

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I was the first guy ever to give my girlfriend an orgasm. I was also the first guy to make her poop at the same time. FML

by WinnerWinnerNotEatingDinner / 11/16/2015 at 1:44am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while at a party playing Truth or Dare, I found out my best friend fantasizes about having sex with my 51 year old mother. The rest of the guys at the party then nodded in agreement and thus spawned a group conversation about how "screwable" my mom is. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2015 at 3:01am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at K-Mart and saw an exact copy of my engagement ring for twenty bucks. The same one that had supposedly been in my fiancé's family for generations, and worth thousands. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2015 at 1:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, I was sexting my boss. I realised that I wasn't texting my boyfriend after I'd sent 2 nudes, and received many sexually provocative responses. FML

by Peter Steele love / 10/17/2015 at 8:49pm / United Kingdom (North Somerset) / Intimacy

Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2015 at 12:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, my friends were right about me being whipped. My girlfriend now has me setting an alarm for 3 hrs after she's fallen asleep, all so I can uncover her feet so she doesn't get too warm. FML

by biggs sprhro / 10/10/2015 at 12:25am / United States (Ohio) / Love