About keyface5 : I'm a senior in high school and play oboe and synthesizer. I love music in general. I love cute things :3
keyface5's FML badges
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keyface5's favorite FMLs
by Torvaltz / 08/07/2016 at 4:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonameow / 07/19/2016 at 9:49am / Animals
by Anonymous / 07/17/2016 at 9:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by DumbassRoaster / 07/10/2016 at 3:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
Today, I was driving with my little brother when out of nowhere he yelled at me to stop. Thinking it was urgent, I slammed my breaks, almost getting rammed from behind. Why did he yell for me to stop? The Pokémon GO said there was a sparrow near us. FML
by PurplePanda_1927 / 07/07/2016 at 10:26pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 12:23pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Kids
by whygod / 06/12/2016 at 9:45am / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a mini heart attack as my dad stopped in the middle of the street and said, "I wonder what'd happen if I just dropped my pants right now and started jerking it in front of all these motherfuckers." FML
by dad, please / 05/16/2016 at 1:37am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/16/2016 at 12:48am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by chickenshit4 / 05/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United States (South Dakota) / Miscellaneous
Today, I briefly had the coolest boss in the world. He stormed over to a nasty customer who was giving me hell, and he absolutely laid into her. It lasted about 10 seconds before he collapsed from a major heart attack. A coworker's already blamed me for not pacifying the customer in the first place and causing all this to happen. FML
by Anonymous / 04/30/2016 at 2:20am / Australia / Work
Today, my wife is treating me like I'm the devil, all because I refused to go on medication that'll kill my sex drive, just so she won't have to deal with me actually wanting to make love more than once a year. FML
by Anonymous / 04/24/2016 at 8:46am / Switzerland (Graubunden) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/16/2016 at 4:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by not satisfied / 02/11/2016 at 12:06pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy