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kevdg

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kevdg
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  • Number of visits : 933
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

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kevdg's favorite FMLs

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8738) - you deserved it (68014)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, I got to say, "My best friend hooked up with my step-sister's grandma's aunt" and be correct. FML

#18465565
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22251) - you deserved it (2001)

On 12/09/2011 at 12:22am - love - by thatisnotcool45 - Canada

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

#18418543
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50971) - you deserved it (5172) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/03/2011 at 11:24am - kids - by perenoel - France

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

#18417408
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27300) - you deserved it (4073)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I went to my overbearing mom's 57th birthday party. He opened his gift in front of her and said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, and the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

#18414489
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20238) - you deserved it (3048)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:35pm - love - by bad blood, no shit (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at the laundromat, when an attractive girl set up at the machine next to mine. She looked me up and down, then noticed the skid-marks on my underwear. FML

#18413058
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8480) - you deserved it (35666)

On 12/02/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by gtfb1993 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the laundromat, when an attractive girl set up at the machine next to mine. She looked me up and down, then noticed the skid-marks on my underwear. FML

#18413058
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8480) - you deserved it (35666)

On 12/02/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by gtfb1993 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was terribly nervous for my patient interview exam as a 4th year medical student. In my nervousness I learned that just because a patient is wearing a T-shirt and shorts, has a short hair cut and a moustache and is named 'Chris', it is not safe to assume that they are male. FML

#18410783
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28339) - you deserved it (3596)

On 12/02/2011 at 9:40am - work - by Monday (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37678) - you deserved it (2853)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, we were going around the table, telling everyone what we were thankful for. My girlfriend said she was thankful for her vibrator, because I can't please her like it can. My family thought this was funny. FML

#18346597
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35612) - you deserved it (8082)

On 11/25/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by notgoodenough - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went camping and shared a tent with this girl I have been sleeping with here and there for a year. To impress her, I popped a certain male enhancement supplement. Thirty minutes later I found out she was on her period. What a long night. FML

#18300773
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9214) - you deserved it (35176)

On 11/20/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by johnnydoe6969 - United States

Today, I was using the bathroom and checking Facebook on my phone. As I'm checking my news feed, I notice a new photo upload by my brother. I guess I forgot to shut the door to the bathroom, because it's me on the toilet. FML

#18291924
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14135) - you deserved it (32434)

On 11/19/2011 at 7:52pm - misc - by beccabooyah - United States

Today, I found an old jock strap in my tuba. FML

#18244771
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22479) - you deserved it (3708)

On 11/14/2011 at 8:23am - misc - by jocksblow - United States

Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML

#18234990
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23376) - you deserved it (1790)

On 11/13/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37258) - you deserved it (7524)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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