kenjenkei

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Offline (the 06/23/2016 at 6:40am)

kenjenkei

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kenjenkeikenjenkei
  • Town/Country : Canberra, Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3842
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About kenjenkei : Eh.

kenjenkei's page activity

Visits<b>jackthemac</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 10:56pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 4:56am<b>karla_darla</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 5:50pm<b>itprosam</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 5:36am<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 2:10pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 3:03pm<b>mehibud</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 9:48pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 10:50pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:09am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 5:03am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 11:04am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 5:58pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:51am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:26pm<b>Mons</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 1:21pm<b>SkullHQ</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 2:20am<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 10:07pm<b>nicolai44</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 1:09am

Fucked!<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 8:10pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:45am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 7:16pm<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 4:07am<b>mehibud</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 12:02am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 12:36am<b>nash1991</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 7:03pm<b>TheBroCodeBros</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 5:22pm<b>donaldthegrump</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 12:42am<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 12:08pm<b>GrinchFu1</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 1:54am<b>jacky75</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 2:57am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 5:35am<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 2:51am<b>DougK76</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:57pm<b>The_Avatar</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 4:46pm<b>sam9697</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 1:34pm<b>jrmertz00</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 1:20pm

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kenjenkei's favorite FMLs

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

by mummer11 / 11/15/2013 at 12:49pm / Ireland / Miscellaneous

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

by regretsteachinghighschool / 11/05/2013 at 8:22am / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML

by bobosgonnagetyou / 11/01/2013 at 2:04am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML

by lifesucks0925 / 09/06/2013 at 3:01am / United States (California) / Work

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

by violated ._. / 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm / United States / Animals

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2013 at 12:45pm / Barbados (Saint Michael) / Love

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2013 at 4:01pm / Portugal / Intimacy

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

by YouSoSmelly / 08/02/2013 at 9:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML

by ktiskool / 08/01/2013 at 12:03am / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, after more than six years of working my ass off, I finally summoned the courage to ask my boss for a raise. She just chuckled, "I'm gonna need you to eat a dick, John." and stared at me unblinking until I awkwardly left. FML

by no new apartment for me / 07/18/2013 at 3:53pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my family. Over the next hour, a huge religious debate erupted, and my grandfather drunkenly told us all how he almost killed himself once while experimenting with auto-erotic asphyxiation. My boyfriend called us all crazy and seems to have dumped me. FML

by fuck family / 07/17/2013 at 4:13pm / Poland (Dolnoslaskie) / Love

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

by hamburger / 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy