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kenjenkei

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kenjenkei

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kenjenkeikenjenkei
  • Town/Country : Canberra, Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 July 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1717
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About kenjenkei : Eh.

kenjenkei's page activity

Visits<b>sam9697</b> - 6 hours ago<b>hjerte</b> - 22 hours ago<b>Takis_Best</b> - yesterday at 10:32am<b>AshOfPalletTown</b> - yesterday at 5:35pm<b>SyN0pTiiC</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 11:18am<b>jrmertz00</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 8:20am<b>sml0723</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 7:26am<b>ech0es</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 4:49am<b>elmassapilo</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 3:08am<b>AllSoul</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 8:47pm<b>tiredteenager</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 8:03pm<b>vb68</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 7:07pm<b>tor415</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 6:50pm<b>xtaffyx</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 6:33pm<b>roxyroller20</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 6:27pm<b>alliepatches12</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 6:04pm<b>CaliCassanova</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:52pm<b>Sausageburger2</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 4:31pm

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kenjenkei's favorite FMLs

Today, while working at McDonald's, an angry customer called asking for his money back. Apparently we'd put 6 cheeseburgers in his bag instead of 5, he ate them all and now feels sick. FML

Today, I tried to storm out of the room during an argument, but walked face-first into our closed sliding glass door. My boyfriend laughed so hard that he had to sit down. Later, we noticed the nose mark I left. He won't let me clean it, because he wants to show it to everyone. FML

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44418) - you deserved it (5391)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML

#20941017
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38201) - you deserved it (3380)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by bobosgonnagetyou - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27296) - you deserved it (39157)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML

#20869873
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41967) - you deserved it (2522)

On 09/06/2013 at 3:01am - work - by lifesucks0925 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

#20860571
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37056) - you deserved it (3032)

On 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

#20849713
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42851) - you deserved it (13802)

On 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm - animals - by violated ._. (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70220) - you deserved it (9278)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

#20820272
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45067) - you deserved it (10376)

On 08/04/2013 at 12:45pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

#20818899
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55807) - you deserved it (8328)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

#20816798
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51749) - you deserved it (11066)

On 08/02/2013 at 9:58am - misc - by YouSoSmelly (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML

#20814477
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50049) - you deserved it (3697)

On 08/01/2013 at 12:03am - kids - by ktiskool (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, after more than six years of working my ass off, I finally summoned the courage to ask my boss for a raise. She just chuckled, "I'm gonna need you to eat a dick, John." and stared at me unblinking until I awkwardly left. FML

#20790691
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46716) - you deserved it (3809)

On 07/18/2013 at 3:53pm - work - by no new apartment for me (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my family. Over the next hour, a huge religious debate erupted, and my grandfather drunkenly told us all how he almost killed himself once while experimenting with auto-erotic asphyxiation. My boyfriend called us all crazy and seems to have dumped me. FML

#20788678
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47126) - you deserved it (5119)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:13pm - love - by fuck family (woman) - Poland (Dolnoslaskie)



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