Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kareniskaos

Offline (the 02/09/2016 at 9:13pm) | Search for a member

kareniskaos

2Fucked!

kareniskaoskareniskaos
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 981
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kareniskaos : Idk what I'm doing with my life

kareniskaos's page activity

Visits<b>chr1sF</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 11:28am<b>BexxyBb</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 7:27am<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 9:17pm<b>kfchicken</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 4:04am<b>CraZCanuck</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 1:10pm<b>lola4455</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 2:01am<b>BlackFames</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:20am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 9:11pm<b>Nathan_Henry</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 1:39pm<b>Miss_Chevious</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 11:07am<b>cfojo</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 10:35pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 8:55pm<b>A07</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:45pm<b>tiwan</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 12:49pm<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 11:15pm<b>lulumars</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 1:23pm<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 3:40am<b>brookenicolee29</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 8:46pm

Fucked!<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 3:17am<b>aclark2523</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:24am

kareniskaos's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of kareniskaos's badges

kareniskaos's favorite FMLs

Today, I was roused from my peaceful slumber by the sound of evil laughter coming from my closet. It was my old Furby, with dead batteries, that I could have sworn I got rid of several years ago. FML

Today, I was the first guy ever to give my girlfriend an orgasm. I was also the first guy to make her poop at the same time. FML

#21493073
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30416) - you deserved it (3106)

On 11/16/2015 at 1:44am - intimacy - by WinnerWinnerNotEatingDinner (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to take a well-deserved shower. When I let my hair down, twenty six cents fell onto the floor. I have no idea how they got there. FML

#21478111
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21062) - you deserved it (3892)

On 10/10/2015 at 12:22am - misc - by kissandcontrol01 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to one another. He then did a naked victory lap around his dad's house, blasting Akon's "I Just Had Sex" at full volume. He's legally an adult. FML

#21472201
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28622) - you deserved it (5573)

On 09/24/2015 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25427) - you deserved it (6718)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, about 30 seconds into my first blowjob, my girlfriend threatened to cut my balls off if I didn't "just fucking cum already". FML

#21446517
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28964) - you deserved it (2859)

On 07/24/2015 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by fuck (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, an attractive man hit on me for the first time since I ended my 3-year relationship with my cheating ex. Then the man told me he'd just gotten out of prison last week. FML

#21446001
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26479) - you deserved it (2622)

On 07/23/2015 at 1:29pm - love - by monogamyisalie - United States

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34562) - you deserved it (2528)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my mom recently stopped taking her medication. I came home to find she'd shot my dog because she thought he was possessed by the devil. FML

#21442016
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40107) - you deserved it (2028)

On 07/15/2015 at 11:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had decided that I was ready to have sex with my boyfriend. So, I called him and told him how naughty I felt, only to realize that I had called my dad. FML

#21441357
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26762) - you deserved it (22163)

On 07/14/2015 at 1:03am - intimacy - by EternalBlossom (woman) - United States

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32854) - you deserved it (2371)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

#21428553
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33612) - you deserved it (14042)

On 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by shmarf (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my wife came back from her camping trip with her friends. I decided to help her out by unpacking her stuff while she used the bathroom. It's funny; I never knew that a dildo, a ball gag and an open pack of condoms were considered camping gear. FML

#21427521
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37557) - you deserved it (2895)

On 06/17/2015 at 10:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on a boat and I thought I saw a towel fly off, but it was actually my fricken dog. FML

#21426414
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32821) - you deserved it (5148)

On 06/15/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by justin Bieber - United States (Michigan)

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

#21423894
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37094) - you deserved it (7778)

On 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: