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kaitlynoliver11

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kaitlynoliver11
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 98
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About kaitlynoliver11 : I like food, swimming, singing, and never wearing shoes. Ever. Yep. That's about it.

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kaitlynoliver11's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking around school alone and felt someone tap my back. I laughed and turned around to find no one was there. I felt confused when I felt the tapping again, which is when I chose to yell at the nearest person, "What?!" I later found out it was a bottle in my backpack tapping me. FML

#21112284
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26690) - you deserved it (8663)

On 04/13/2014 at 9:32pm - misc - by ohmygod582 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I resorted to the oldest prank in the book: laxatives in the food. Except it wasn't for a prank, but just a desperate attempt to get my clingy boyfriend to leave me the hell alone. I think I'm going to hell. FML

#21101967
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35345) - you deserved it (9458)

On 04/01/2014 at 3:21pm - love - by someone (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my Game of Thrones addicted girlfriend decided to name my penis Tyrion Lannister. FML

#21101155
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34600) - you deserved it (5284)

On 03/31/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by off to the whorehouse, then (man) - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, I was telling my friends about a date I had recently that went badly, because the guy turned out to be a moron. I said the last straw was when I used the word "decipher" and was met with a blank stare. I was then met with more blank stares. FML

#21090611
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34744) - you deserved it (5561)

On 03/19/2014 at 2:25am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my neighbours that I wasn't "watching porn" earlier, and that I was honestly just watching an episode of Game of Thrones. FML

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

#21086197
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37977) - you deserved it (7408) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

#21081466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45219) - you deserved it (8509)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I have exactly 204 snowflakes saved onto my computer, all of which I made on this snowflake-making website. This is what my life has come to. FML

#21076482
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30466) - you deserved it (8398)

On 03/03/2014 at 12:18am - misc - by ealovan - United States (Iowa)

Today, I learned that no matter how much you want the Nutella, it's never a good idea to deep-throat the knife. FML

#21073034
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16756) - you deserved it (53145)

On 02/27/2014 at 9:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my daughter hugged me around the neck and whispered, "I'm going to cut your head off." I'm afraid to go to sleep now. FML

#21043189
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40425) - you deserved it (4686)

On 01/28/2014 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Bahrain (Al Manamah)

Today, my brother asked me if I wanted to see a magic trick. I stupidly said yes and now have a black eye from where he punched me. My dad thinks it's hilarious and my mum says he didn't know any better. He's 13. FML

#21035253
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41069) - you deserved it (4993)

On 01/21/2014 at 5:27pm - health - by cuntocracy (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I discovered I have epilepsy. 10 years ago, I told my mother about my frequent fits of vertigo, deja vu, nausea, flashes of memory and strange sounds, smells, and images, coupled with an other-worldly feeling. I thought they were holy visions. So did she. FML

Today, I went for a jog. I was 5 km away from home when I had a sudden urge to poop. I didn't want to use the bushes, so I thought I could hold it in. I was wrong. FML

#19890134
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19863) - you deserved it (4769)

On 07/04/2012 at 9:48am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I tried to be kind to animals and get my dad to buy cage-free eggs. When I told him it was dollar more, he started yelling and making a scene in the middle of the store, saying that chickens are ugly and they deserve to suffer. FML

#19469757
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22984) - you deserved it (5580)

On 04/14/2012 at 11:46pm - misc - by ilovechickens - United States

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

#19391692
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22676) - you deserved it (2731)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)



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