Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

k_lylepad

Offline (12 hours ago) | Search for a member

k_lylepad

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 29 January 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3102
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About k_lylepad : I'm weird...but I think that's okay.

k_lylepad's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 9:40am<b>Suchadiva</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 11:06am<b>bmba94</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 2:42am<b>ivanfrombg</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 4:10pm<b>juice_33</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 2:35am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 2:22am<b>paravoz</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 2:15am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 11:46pm<b>Cameron257</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 11:15pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 10:23pm<b>TPH1979</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 10:19pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 9:50pm<b>Isaiah80008</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 9:47pm<b>shockhead101</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 9:43pm<b>C7</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 9:37pm<b>ThuNDeY</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 9:21pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 9:20pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 7:57pm

Fucked!<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 5:46am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 4:23am<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 3:50am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 3:20am<b>patts_</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 7:46pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 6:08am

k_lylepad's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of k_lylepad's badges

k_lylepad's favorite FMLs

Today, I was lying on a couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

#21459977
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18719) - you deserved it (8098)

On 08/24/2015 at 4:46am - misc - by Annie (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, even after explaining to my boyfriend that I was self conscious about my breasts because they're slightly misshaped, he still persisted with begging me for a tit pic, saying he would still see me as beautiful. I gave in and sent one. He responded with "LOL WHAT ARE THOOOOOOSSSEE." FML

#21459438
162 comments

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23676) - you deserved it (6112)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, I was walking to my car with 600 dollars worth of books because I start college next week, when I was robbed by some guy that sounded like Cartman. He punched me because I could not stop laughing whenever he would try to threaten me. FML

Today, I asked my one-year-old to come and give mommy a kiss. She did and it was really sweet, until she tried to spit a piece of dog food into my mouth. FML

#21452734
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21202) - you deserved it (2687)

On 08/06/2015 at 1:28pm - kids - by gross - United States

Today, at the beach, I noticed a plastic bag in the water. I wanted to do something good for a change, help protect the environment and get it out. It wasn't a bag; it was a jellyfish. FML

#21236316
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39515) - you deserved it (8439) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/13/2014 at 12:28am - animals - by Muwz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML

#21194154
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30369) - you deserved it (44287)

On 06/30/2014 at 7:39pm - kids - by BaWanda (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home and saw my cat all snuggled up with another cat on the sofa. I thought it was the cutest thing ever, until I remembered that I only have one cat. FML

#21191841
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43073) - you deserved it (4767)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, we went to the wedding of one of my friends. As she was about to throw her bouquet, my boyfriend muttered that if I tried to catch it, we'd be through. FML

#21182017
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44381) - you deserved it (5334)

On 06/20/2014 at 3:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was video chatting my boyfriend. As we were talking, he answered a phone call. I sat there the whole time as he planned a date with some other girl over the phone. FML

#21180967
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54208) - you deserved it (7199)

On 06/19/2014 at 6:26pm - love - by forever alone - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML

#21180887
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48813) - you deserved it (5111)

On 06/19/2014 at 5:05pm - love - by Fuck you, Dad. Fuck you. (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my boyfriend once again cancelled a date because he has too much homework. His professor is my dad, who's assigning astronomical amounts of homework to keep us from seeing each other. FML

#21180214
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58838) - you deserved it (4641)

On 06/19/2014 at 1:28am - love - by professorsdaughter - United States (Washington)

Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML

#21174074
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46948) - you deserved it (6723)

On 06/14/2014 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, at my mother's open-casket funeral, my sister-in-law went to pay her respects. As she stood in front of the body, she coughed, muttering "bitch" in the process. Either nobody else noticed or nobody cared, and she went on her way, noticeably not choked up at all. FML

#21173556
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42849) - you deserved it (4141)

On 06/13/2014 at 6:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: