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jules_ocean

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jules_ocean
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  • Number of visits : 95
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jules_ocean's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my girlfriend if she had ever broken up with anyone. She said, "Yes. You." and walked off. FML

#20833166
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47419) - you deserved it (5827)

On 08/12/2013 at 12:49am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML

#20831608
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21640) - you deserved it (57300)

On 08/11/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57192) - you deserved it (3613)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML

#20811460
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37947) - you deserved it (12588)

On 07/30/2013 at 12:42pm - misc - by kiwichick4life (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, whilst waiting tables at work, I served a young couple the milkshakes they had ordered. The woman at the next table verbally abused me for "teasing" her screaming sons with "unhealthy foods". FML

#20745796
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41392) - you deserved it (2315)

On 06/25/2013 at 1:24am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after asking my psychiatrist about natural alternatives to medication for my depression, she replied, "Why not Zoidberg?" FML

#20744996
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27584) - you deserved it (5235)

On 06/24/2013 at 6:12pm - health - by thanksdoc (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, whilst trying on wedding dresses with my mom, she told me that I looked fat and awful in the dress I liked. When I told her how hurtful she was being, she told me that I should be grateful that she told me what she thought instead of laughing at me behind my back. FML

#20722079
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40909) - you deserved it (6371)

On 06/12/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by mysea8679 (woman) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63179) - you deserved it (17993)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my new landlord and lettings agent made an illegal entry into my house. Unfortunately, at the time my boyfriend was buck naked, smoking a joint on the sofa, surrounded by the cats we aren't supposed to have. FML

#20620173
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27111) - you deserved it (39689)

On 04/25/2013 at 2:28am - misc - by goingtobeevicted - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my book bag was so heavy that it set off my car's passenger detection system in the front seat. I had to buckle in my textbooks. FML

#20068805
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20824) - you deserved it (2998)

On 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to court to file a small claim and found myself at the end of a huge line. The moment I got to the front of the line, the fire alarm went off and we all had to leave the building. The moment I got outside, the alarm stopped and everybody rushed back in. I'm at the back of the line. FML

#18461010
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38845) - you deserved it (3167)

On 12/08/2011 at 3:41pm - money - by Dante178 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML

#17982026
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31566) - you deserved it (2135)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32000) - you deserved it (4347)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was arguing with a friend over whether or not I'm fat. She kept telling me that I was. Angry, I sat down on the chair beside her. It broke. FML

#17428761
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25693) - you deserved it (19951)

On 08/10/2011 at 12:12pm - misc - by elvisfreak5446 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was getting funny looks all day. When I got home I realised that I was interrupted while doing my make-up this morning and completely forgot to fill in my second eye brow. FML

#16046636
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14365) - you deserved it (22958)

On 05/04/2011 at 5:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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