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julako

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julako

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2429
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About julako : "I am a linguist. I love ambiguity more than most people."

julako's page activity

Visits<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 6:36am<b>darkstarrising</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 1:59am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 12:16am<b>extrasnipes</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 7:16pm<b>SlimDanny</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 8:36pm<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 12:54pm<b>xorenae</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 7:43pm<b>steve1122</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 5:58pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 7:26pm<b>Rizzy_A</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 5:15pm<b>mlowy</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 6:28pm<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 5:58pm<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 7:16pm<b>Tyde</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:52pm<b>iYamEmoRay</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 10:03am<b>jimmymanning58</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 4:38pm<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 8:59pm<b>im_fran</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 6:56pm

Fucked!<b>rogwest</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 2:27pm

julako's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of julako's badges

julako's favorite FMLs

Today, an old lady wearing a low-cut shirt with no bra underneath came into my line with some groceries. At some point while bagging her groceries, her wrinkled breast slipped out of her shirt. She didn't even notice. I wish to fuck I could unsee this. FML

#21432649
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25808) - you deserved it (1915)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, as I finished my piano recital and took a bow, I farted into the microphone. FML

#21428226
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29559) - you deserved it (3688)

On 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm - work - by fartypants - United States (Florida)

Today, a woman bitched me out at the grocery store, saying that since I'm not Indian, I shouldn't be wearing a bindi - a red dot on my forehead - because it's "cultural appropriation". I was too embarrassed to tell her it was actually a pimple I'd been trying to pop on my forehead. FML

#21428154
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29238) - you deserved it (2500)

On 06/18/2015 at 4:09pm - misc - by unsuccessful popping - United States (New York)

Today, my ex-boyfriend dumped sand into the crankcase of my truck and then filled it to the top with water after I dumped him for being immature and not respecting my things. FML

#21427999
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29002) - you deserved it (2973)

On 06/18/2015 at 8:36am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, the phone kept ringing so I picked it up and answered. When there was no response, it took a minute to realize that I was still in bed and talking to my hand. FML

#21418531
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24754) - you deserved it (4372)

On 05/31/2015 at 11:51am - misc - by Sleepy (woman) - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)

Today, at my daughter's wedding celebration, I was doing a Michael Jackson act with a few buddies. It went well until I did the crotch-grab. I yanked my balls too hard and fell to the floor, writhing in agony in front of nearly 70 guests. FML

#21417667
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15271) - you deserved it (23464)

On 05/29/2015 at 4:15pm - health - by not a kiddy fiddler really (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got into a heated argument with my girlfriend. Not because of anything I did, but because she actually believes that pasteurization is when a pastor blesses a dairy product. "You know, like kosher." FML

#21416018
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26419) - you deserved it (2449)

On 05/26/2015 at 11:12am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I lost a book. I'd used my credit card as a bookmark. FML

#21415900
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14418) - you deserved it (45758)

On 05/26/2015 at 2:54am - money - by stupid (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was fired for not asking a senior citizen for proof that he was over 21 and legally allowed to purchase alcohol. When I told my manager he was clearly over 21, he replied, "But what if he WASN'T?" FML

#21412440
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30127) - you deserved it (3098)

On 05/19/2015 at 7:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML

#21412386
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29221) - you deserved it (4491)

On 05/19/2015 at 2:45am - intimacy - by username - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I had to pick my brother up from work because he broke down crying. I arrived to find that apparently, you can get so stoned that serving a pregnant woman at a fast food joint moves you to tears over the miracle of life. FML

#21409953
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30167) - you deserved it (2213)

On 05/14/2015 at 10:23am - misc - by sistertaxi - Australia

Today, I stuck my hand out the car window and noticed my arm fat flapping in the wind. FML

#21409639
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22941) - you deserved it (9140)

On 05/13/2015 at 7:19pm - health - by windthroughmyflab - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I somehow got into the conversation of what the weirdest thing we have ever found in food was. She said she found paper in her fortune cookie; she was serious. FML

#21406274
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28615) - you deserved it (2501)

On 05/07/2015 at 3:52pm - misc - by Random737193 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

#21401411
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30970) - you deserved it (4547)

On 04/28/2015 at 9:36pm - misc - by fatty - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a cute, new guy I always run into at work hit on me. Turns out he's only 18. I'm old enough to be his mom. FML

#21399135
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26757) - you deserved it (3397)

On 04/24/2015 at 5:46pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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