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  • Number of visits : 825
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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josh7279's page activity

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josh7279's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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josh7279's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally found out why my new co-worker has been shooting me dirty looks, being rude to me, and generally trying to avoid me. It's because I have blonde hair and blue eyes, and she thinks people like me are Nazis. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25677) - you deserved it (1573)

On 10/17/2015 at 8:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was pushing so hard to take a number two that I ended up passing out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20888) - you deserved it (4947)

On 10/03/2015 at 11:30am - health - by Till We Pass Out - United Kingdom (Calderdale)

Today, I had a big figure skating competition. Many of the girls before me fell or did not execute their jumps correctly. Me? I skated a flawless program. I was placed last because they said I didn't push myself hard enough to the point of falling. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42142) - you deserved it (2890)

On 02/06/2015 at 9:35pm - misc - by depressedskatergirl - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41128) - you deserved it (7574)

On 01/23/2015 at 2:25pm - kids - by nosexforthee (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out first-hand that the most horrifying sight you can ever witness is two morbidly obese people getting nasty with each other in a dance club's run-down, public restroom. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35701) - you deserved it (5274)

On 12/12/2014 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45029) - you deserved it (12499)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom told me my relationship is a joke, because teenagers don't understand the meaning of relationships and commitment. I couldn't help but remind her how she's divorced three separate men to date. She hit me over the head so hard that snot flew out of my nose. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56406) - you deserved it (10816)

On 07/18/2014 at 7:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML


I agree, your life sucks (54539) - you deserved it (4679)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm - misc - by Is that..? - United States (Colorado)

Today, while driving home, some idiot kept tailgating me, so I slowed down, hoping he'd overtake me. He didn't, so I pulled to the side of the road. He did the same, in front of me. He kept toying with me until I crashed into another car trying to speed away from him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45696) - you deserved it (15196)

On 05/23/2014 at 6:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51855) - you deserved it (4730)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML


I agree, your life sucks (49709) - you deserved it (6977)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey on my breast. To be fair I decided to give him a hickey on his chest. He was so worried about catching shit from the guys on his swim team that he dislocated my jaw trying to get me off him. FML

Today, after years of insomnia and going to doctors to help get a regular sleeping pattern, I finally fell asleep without the help of medication, only to dream about being chased by an angry seal and singing to Rihanna with a horse. This is probably why I don't sleep. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43946) - you deserved it (4075)

On 02/03/2014 at 8:29am - health - by Sleepless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

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