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jon06

Offline (the 02/02/2016 at 3:05pm) | Search for a member

jon06

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 710
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jon06's page activity

Visits<b>chashem</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 4:08pm<b>yoursucklives</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 2:28am<b>m1e0l</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:56pm

jon06's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

jon06's favorite FMLs

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

#18738481
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30298) - you deserved it (14832)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm - misc - by Jman6295 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

#18650275
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30761) - you deserved it (4201)

On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML

#18531722
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34142) - you deserved it (5773)

On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56753) - you deserved it (17940)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

#16932520
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35311) - you deserved it (3819)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by ugh annoying - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML

#16774144
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40903) - you deserved it (12671)

On 06/21/2011 at 12:46am - love - by holdengurl18 - China

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML

#16519347
479 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12532) - you deserved it (129069)

On 06/05/2011 at 8:52pm - misc - by kringr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
442 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41129) - you deserved it (10936)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

#15532710
485 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58771) - you deserved it (29179)

On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went into labor with my first child, and as much as I pleaded, I had to wait for my husband to finish his raid in World of Warcraft before he'd take me to the hospital. FML

#14093813
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72899) - you deserved it (11483)

On 12/05/2010 at 8:38am - health - by newmother (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a telemarketer found me so weird that he hung up on me. FML

#13861798
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25898) - you deserved it (8438)

On 11/16/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was bored so I got my little brother's toy spaceship and a teddy bear, went to my room and started flying them around, having dog fights, making explosion noises and humming epic orchestral music. My mom opened my bedroom door, showing our new hot female neighbour around the house. I'm 19. FML

#13203283
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14841) - you deserved it (36543)

On 09/26/2010 at 12:10am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to record us having sex and me screaming his name. He set it as my ringtone without telling me. I had my phone volume on high as I was hanging out with my family. FML

#12612003
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37597) - you deserved it (10596)

On 08/18/2010 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by XxMe123xx - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

#9797503
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19308) - you deserved it (44587)

On 04/11/2010 at 4:11am - intimacy - by junior - United States (Arizona)



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