johnlockshipper

Search for a member

Offline (the 06/06/2015 at 9:11pm)

johnlockshipper

10Fucked!

johnlockshipperjohnlockshipper
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 January 1999 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2220
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About johnlockshipper : Mulder it's me

johnlockshipper's page activity

Visits<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 8:36pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 5:26am<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 2:42pm<b>mongoosemike</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 9:03am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 2:19pm<b>Chrriis</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 4:07am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:16am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 10:06pm<b>hantu69</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:45pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:10am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:20pm<b>olpally</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 8:47pm<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 2:23am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 9:01pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:19am<b>MissMayLaw001</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 2:04am<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 1:07am<b>thomasrasmussen7</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 12:04am

Fucked!<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 8:42pm<b>hantu69</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 2:50am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 3:01am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 8:19am<b>RA91</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 11:15pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:03am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 1:03am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 8:59am<b>Sethan01</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 9:28pm

johnlockshipper's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of johnlockshipper's badges

johnlockshipper's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter cried for ages after finding out that Nick Amaro was written out of Law and Order: SVU. She barely reacted when I told her that her mom and I are getting a divorce. FML

by svunimportant / 05/28/2015 at 11:40am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my ex trying to slash my car tires with a knife. She actually had the balls to claim she was testing my tire pressure, before power-walking off into the distance like nothing had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 05/15/2015 at 9:17pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I had to pick my brother up from work because he broke down crying. I arrived to find that apparently, you can get so stoned that serving a pregnant woman at a fast food joint moves you to tears over the miracle of life. FML

by sistertaxi / 05/14/2015 at 10:23am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandpa told me he was going to be eating out tonight, and I asked at which restaurant. He replied "Your gran's room." and winked. I didn't need that mental image, at all. FML

by -_- / 05/13/2015 at 12:00pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, a coworker told my manager that I and another girl were plotting to get her fired at the end of the month. She actually believed her. Now we're suspended without pay for two weeks for conspiracy. FML

by Completely Innocent / 03/05/2015 at 12:10pm / United States / Work

Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML

by Anonymous / 02/10/2015 at 9:51am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Love

Today, my boss told me she had a nightmare where her life depended on me, and I let her die. Now I'm ridiculously paranoid that I'm going to get fired at any second. FML

by notahero / 01/08/2015 at 11:40pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

by whovian / 12/25/2014 at 10:17am / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

by lexigan4 / 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

by mykodu / 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I can't go on watching season 8 of The Big Bang Theory, not because of the steady decline of the show's quality, but because I can't stand Penny's new haircut. FML

by shelookslikemiley / 09/23/2014 at 8:48am / Australia / Geek

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

by anonymous / 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

by ihatejasonderulo / 09/02/2014 at 11:32am / United Kingdom (Hounslow) / Intimacy