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jmansoon

Offline (the 12/28/2014 at 2:36am) | Search for a member

jmansoon

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 172
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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jmansoon's page activity

Visits<b>Dcaxcs</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 1:34pm

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jmansoon's favorite FMLs

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

#19991299
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30401) - you deserved it (1520)

On 07/29/2012 at 7:34pm - health - by sy123 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML

#17029959
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30164) - you deserved it (2393)

On 07/08/2011 at 3:43pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70098) - you deserved it (6586)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

#14518129
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27607) - you deserved it (5369)

On 01/09/2011 at 5:18am - intimacy - by S - Singapore

Today, while showing my art work at a festival, a very old cougar walked up to me and asked if I wanted to hook up later. After refusing more than one time, the woman walked away with my business card. I've been getting emails with naked pictures. FML

#6437512
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21939) - you deserved it (5141)

On 11/24/2009 at 4:42pm - intimacy - by deathbysnoosnoo - United States (California)

Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML

#6435507
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12964) - you deserved it (50379)

On 11/24/2009 at 12:11pm - animals - by yomamma787 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I tried to be sexy and put a condom on with my mouth. Instead, I inhaled it and my boyfriend broke three of my ribs giving me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

#4155124
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22566) - you deserved it (55009)

On 07/30/2009 at 5:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was at a party and I really had to use the bathroom. There were 30-40 people talking outside the door, so I thought it would be ok to make some noise. Just as I'm about to begin having explosive diarrhea, everyone falls silent as my dad begins to pray for our meal. FML

#3882567
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47631) - you deserved it (5058)

On 07/19/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Churizmo - United States

Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was moving his hand from his thigh to my chest but on the way he sort of squeezed my stomach. When I asked him why he did that, he told me that "his fingers got stuck under my roll." FML

#334226
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56541) - you deserved it (18607)

On 03/15/2009 at 1:07am - misc - by marsbar (woman) - United States (New York)



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