jjohnnydepp

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jjohnnydepp

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 7 November 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 382
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jjohnnydepp : I want to be an architect. I'm in high school. I like soccer manga reading and playing sports. I like funny people who can make me laugh.(it's not hard) I'm easily bored. so yeah

jjohnnydepp's page activity

Visits<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 12:02am<b>Aero_x</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 7:59am<b>JustAddABow15</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 12:23am<b>hannnahmarie</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 2:10pm<b>JillianBall</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 12:01am<b>butthole321</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 11:40pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 10:57pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:59am<b>IowaCowgirl</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 9:10am

jjohnnydepp's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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jjohnnydepp's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police slammed on my door. My neighbor called them, saying it sounded like someone was being murdered. FML

by katchoo / 11/03/2013 at 2:34am / Denmark / Animals

Today, I was at a family meeting about opening up a business. During it, I had an allergic reaction and my throat began to close. Nobody tried to help. In fact, pictures were taken. FML

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2013 at 3:13am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

by mustabeendrugs / 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, some ass-bandit broke into my house by smashing a window, just so he could steal the ancient VHS cassette player that my wife wouldn't let me throw away. Thanks, scumbag, but the front door was unlocked. FML

by and she blames me -_- / 10/13/2013 at 5:50pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece, I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was, "well, I'm either going to insult your art or your face." FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2013 at 7:43am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

by redneckfamily / 05/24/2013 at 3:06am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

by seriously / 05/24/2013 at 3:04am / United States / Animals

Today, my mom took me to a bar to cheer me up after being dumped. Two cute guys around my age kept looking over at us the whole night. When I told my mom, she said she was going to get them to come talk to me. Instead, she ended up leaving with both of them. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 1:10pm / United States (California) / Love

Today I returned home after a semester at university. I guess I did too good a job of getting into shape as my parents phoned the police, thinking I was a burglar. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 5:44am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went for a walk. When it started pouring, I ran under the nearest tree for protection. It didn't occur to me that it might look suspicious hiding under a stranger's tree in a black hoodie, until the cops showed up. FML

by black hoodie / 05/19/2013 at 7:07pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried lying to my parents for the first time. My mother is a neuroscientist and my father is a psychologist. Somehow, they managed to make me admit that I was lying before I'd even finished. FML

by blondie107 / 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after my mom picked me up from the mall, she asked me what was in my bag from Gap. I wouldn't tell her, and she ended up grounding me. It was her Mother's Day present. FML

by anonymous / 05/06/2013 at 2:08pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

by wtf yourself, cunt / 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

by amythest / 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Kids