jgaspero

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jgaspero

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 June 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 488
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jgaspero : Love life and yourself :)

jgaspero's page activity

Visits<b>jpgasp</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 1:23am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:02pm<b>user109012</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 9:14am<b>pavingboy</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 2:33pm<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 1:02pm<b>Anarchy66</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 10:07pm<b>badluckross</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 7:48pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 5:14pm<b>jacknapes2000</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 9:52pm<b>ceji3</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 9:39am<b>Aeroxx1337</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 2:18am<b>Malihax</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 10:37am

jgaspero's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

jgaspero's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm recovering in the emergency room. How did I get here? Intoxicated at a coed party, I saw a hole in the host's shed and thought it funny to christen it a "glory-hole", only to be bitten by what may well have been a black widow spider. FML

by Widowmaker / 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm / United States (Nevada) / Health

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML

by youfuckingslut / 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm / United States / Money

Today, while dog sitting my neighbor's Great Dane, I decided to order pizza. As soon as I received it, the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I moved, he ran full force and knocked me into the door, causing me to fall and drop the pizza, which he promptly devoured in front of me. FML

by Grauncho / 09/22/2012 at 10:12am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I was out apartment hunting with my boyfriend. We visited a marvelous place that ticked all the boxes on our requirement checklist, but my boyfriend was unenthused. There was just one small detail that I hadn’t factored in: it's very badly located if ever zombies attack. FML

by TBTC / 08/31/2012 at 3:16am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Miscellaneous

Today, at football practice, the biggest lineman shouldered me so hard in the groin that my protective cup pushed back with enough force to crack the bone. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2012 at 8:46pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Health

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

by parenting sucks / 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

by swedishdude / 11/14/2009 at 8:37am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous