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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 30 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1266
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jezane : Seriously... Does anyone actually read these?..

Anyway, I'm true blue Aussie and get bored easily... Very easily.

I don't care for people complaining about a pathetic excuses of an issue, especially punctuation and religious beliefs. So long as the text is legible it should not be abused and people's beliefs are their own, not an opinion readily open for alterations.

If ya bored then send us a message, I'm usually on my iPhone and probably won't respond to fast but I'm always up for a random chat or cheap laugh.

Now get back to fml-ing and have a few laughs

jezane's page activity

Visits<b>ThisIsCarlJr</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 1:53pm<b>tipperO1</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 3:45pm<b>annikatariina</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 9:19am<b>XxMuFaSaxX</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 5:03am<b>AJXDGaming</b> - the 06/01/2016 at 8:06pm<b>tigerisabelle</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 2:08am<b>rosieee777</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 10:42am<b>jman1324</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 5:11pm<b>DownFaLL57</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 12:08pm<b>StarOfDoom</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:33pm<b>sky_R03</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 11:10pm<b>teentee401</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 11:46am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 1:53pm<b>sugoi72</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:35pm<b>pear_flavored</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 7:51pm<b>msk1155</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 7:37pm<b>Astavo</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 6:02pm<b>Snake1105</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 5:20pm

Fucked!<b>sugoi72</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 4:36am<b>ppeanutheadd</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 12:23am

jezane's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of jezane's badges

jezane's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend came and sat on my lap. She landed directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. FML

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

by tuggernuts / 07/17/2012 at 11:32am / United States / Intimacy

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

by totallyembarassed / 07/07/2012 at 12:08am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sneezed my jaw out of socket. Yes, this is possible. FML

by hotpatata / 07/06/2012 at 11:03am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, my tampon string was hanging from my bathing suit. My boyfriend thought it was a thread hanging from my bikini bottom. He publicly pulled out my tampon. FML

by rebekah / 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love