Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jessal

Online | Search for a member

jessal

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 October 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4971
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About jessal : I'm easy going and fun. If you want to know more then message me.

jessal's page activity

Visits<b>watermelon15</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 10:41am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 7:02am<b>platypus546</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 1:50pm<b>UserOfTheMind</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 1:01am<b>FEATHDUCK</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 4:45pm<b>JessMac9000</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 5:22pm<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 5:51am<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:52am<b>skyblueprincess</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:57pm<b>15Erik</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 7:52pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 11:54pm<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 11:21pm<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 5:44pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 1:31pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 10:11pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 11:02pm<b>xmalachix</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 5:05pm<b>Cads1</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 3:35am

Fucked!<b>15Erik</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 1:52am<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 5:21am<b>Cads1</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 9:35am<b>TheIronFez</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 11:29pm<b>Mafia_</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 7:49pm<b>troydeluca</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:20pm

jessal's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of jessal's badges

jessal's favorite FMLs

Today, I visited my 90-year-old great-grandmother and her boyfriend. This wouldn't be a problem, if this boyfriend wasn't different than the one she had yesterday. She told me not to tell him about "the other one". FML

#21521764
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19012) - you deserved it (1440)

On 02/01/2016 at 11:37am - love - by anon (woman) - United States

Today, after dating my girlfriend for a while, I had a realization. She often says things like, "You're my favorite!" and scratches my beard, which I appreciated affectionately. Upon meeting her pets, it dawned on me that I am just another one of her cats. FML

#21513338
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22197) - you deserved it (2199)

On 01/09/2016 at 9:07pm - love - by Jack (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my step mom sat me down and told me that she doesn't think that my dad is my biological father because she hasn't gotten pregnant from him. I don't think she quite understands the concept of being a step mom. FML

#21502978
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22969) - you deserved it (1966)

On 12/12/2015 at 3:58pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I did such a bad job explaining the recent change from daylight savings time, that my 5-year-old son is now convinced that we're time travellers. FML

#21489205
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20691) - you deserved it (4419)

On 11/06/2015 at 12:02pm - kids - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking through school when I noticed an advertisement for school picture retakes. It read, "Bad hair day?" Underneath was my picture. That's my normal hair. FML

Today, I decided to take a well-deserved shower. When I let my hair down, twenty six cents fell onto the floor. I have no idea how they got there. FML

#21478111
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21060) - you deserved it (3892)

On 10/10/2015 at 12:22am - misc - by kissandcontrol01 - United States (California)

Today, I found out my son told his teachers that I make his brother Tom sleep on the floor, make him stay out of the house for long periods of time, and don't let him use the toilet. Tom is actually our cat. FML

#21477463
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25158) - you deserved it (1765)

On 10/08/2015 at 7:53am - animals - by Bad Mother (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, my mom was watching me during my Taekwondo lessons. She was yelling at me to focus on my own work and to quit hanging out with the little kids. I'm the instructor. FML

#21474290
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25042) - you deserved it (1655)

On 09/29/2015 at 6:50pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, with the most certainty and confidence that I have ever seen in her, my 16-year-old daughter told me an egg is a fruit because of its "hard shell and growing seed." FML

#21472478
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23000) - you deserved it (2554)

On 09/25/2015 at 1:42am - kids - by Failed_Dad (man) - United States (California)

Today, my car went missing. My sister constantly asks to borrow it, so I called her and asked if she had it. She swore blind that she didn't, so I called the cops and reported it stolen. They soon caught her driving the stolen vehicle. She blames me and is now telling everyone I set her up to be arrested. FML

#21455905
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29203) - you deserved it (1696)

On 08/14/2015 at 6:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ukraine (Donets'ka Oblast')

Today, I woke up panting and drenched in sweat from a horrible nightmare. I'd been dreaming that bright, colored shapes were falling from the sky and I couldn't make them all neatly align with one another on the ground. I guess I should stop playing so much Tetris before bed. FML

#21453585
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22175) - you deserved it (4839)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:56pm - misc - by I love L (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I stayed over at my boyfriend's house for the first time. He soon found out about my sleep-talking habit. I started ranting about "electron shaming" and I apparently passionately support their "sub-atomic lifestyle". Yes, he managed to get it on video. FML

#21439547
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26735) - you deserved it (3081)

On 07/10/2015 at 12:57pm - misc - by wantmeasandwich (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, my husband asked me to buy a different brand of dish soap, as the one he was using wasn't working. After a quick look, I had to agree. The lemon cordial he had been using, while tasting nice, didn't really help clean the dishes. FML

Today, it was the first time a guy has shown any interest in me by calling me pretty. I was so shocked that instead of saying thank you, I hid behind the nearest object and promptly giggle-snorted. FML



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: