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jenniferzamo

Offline (the 02/12/2015 at 4:39am) | Search for a member

jenniferzamo

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  • Number of visits : 99
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>olpally</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 12:28am

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jenniferzamo's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML

#3456534
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68500) - you deserved it (4989)

On 07/03/2009 at 3:06pm - animals - by RachelDC (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84759) - you deserved it (226314)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I flew from Chicago to San Francisco to get some of my stuff out of a storage unit. I left the keys for the padlock at home. FML

#2530639
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19543) - you deserved it (48426)

On 06/02/2009 at 12:14pm - misc - by Tom (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was riding a longboard down a hill and I fell off. I was all scraped up so I made sure to clean my wounds and put bandages on them. Turns out I'm allergic to the glue on the bandages and I have itchy hives all over and around my open wounds. FML

#2495285
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44551) - you deserved it (4859)

On 06/01/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by Boarder - United States (New Jersey)

Today, two of my cousins sat me down and said they wanted to give me an early Birthday present. With straight faces, they look at me and say: "we signed you up for eHarmony, and paid for 12 months." Not only do my cousins think I need help finding a boyfriend, but they think it take a year. FML

#2051394
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47506) - you deserved it (5207)

On 05/18/2009 at 4:43pm - love - by imnotTHATlonely (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, While I was running around the block I had this urge to spit. Suddenly I noticed this beautiful girl running in front me. Trying to impress her, I smiled and by mistake drooled everything on the pavement. She wasn't impressed. FML

#1299793
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13384) - you deserved it (43882)

On 04/24/2009 at 8:13pm - misc - by djteller (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I told my dad I was leaving to get some beauty sleep. He looked at me laughing and said "See you in a decade." FML

#52270
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39559) - you deserved it (5983)

On 02/16/2009 at 10:05am - misc - by mags (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

#22681
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36408) - you deserved it (5799)

On 02/10/2009 at 10:11pm - misc - by thunder thighs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, though I'm normally unperturbed by my single-ness, I walked by some squirrels engaged in mating rituals and felt a pang of jealousy. FML

#5133
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28837) - you deserved it (3488)

On 02/02/2009 at 5:49am - love - by murphy - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a guy sitting next to me in class asked me for a pen. I accidentally handed him a tampon instead. FML

#3375
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27453) - you deserved it (8036)

On 01/29/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by iFail - United States (California)



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