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jd3773's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/10/2013 at 3:28pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/08/2013 at 2:59am / United States / Miscellaneous
by BIGCHEIFAAA / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 9:38am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by really? / 04/13/2013 at 5:21am / United States / Miscellaneous
by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
Today, I was screamed at and told that I was denying someone's "second amendment" by not letting him through with a gun. I work at the border; he was trying to enter Canada. This is not the first time, and it probably won't be the last. FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2013 at 6:23am / Canada / Work
Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML
by badparent / 04/08/2013 at 12:26am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML
by Evalynne / 04/06/2013 at 8:55am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
by madiison09 / 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a blonde tourist came up to me and asked me for directions to the nearest train station. I politely directed her there, and she left. Five minutes later, she came back and slapped me for not bringing her to an "English-speaking station". We're in China, lady. FML
by dumb tourists / 03/31/2013 at 2:19am / China (Beijing) / Miscellaneous
Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML
by fuck you dad / 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm / Ireland (Monaghan) / Miscellaneous
Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
by fucked by sex ed / 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/13/2013 at 1:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
- Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, it’s been a week since I arrived in Cuba. Gustav came to visit us. Now it’s Hannah’s turn.… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because…