Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jadeluv

Search for a member

jadeluv

28Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Nowhere, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 April 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7836
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jadeluv : Dude, stop being a stalker and just message me already (:

jadeluv's page activity

Visits<b>HarryHirsch</b> - 47 minutes ago<b>Bradley_Dillon</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 10:34pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 5:50pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 5:39pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:19am<b>nygiantsfan85</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 7:49pm<b>blade1699</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 5:31pm<b>hunter9141</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 12:40pm<b>SirRipsABong420</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 2:49am<b>mookie10</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 6:05am<b>MrMoofinMan</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 8:42am<b>KayTee96</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 6:22pm<b>Gabe9368</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:06pm<b>Junkiegamer</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 10:52am<b>RachelHigg</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 12:40pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:09am<b>foaming</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:57am<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 6:30am

Fucked!<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 7:16am<b>mookie10</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:39pm<b>24jfred</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:54am<b>baseball27LD</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 2:02am<b>Zacky_Chan</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 10:56am<b>apgreen69</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 2:58am<b>pratikp03</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 12:53pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 5:38am<b>_just_joshin_ya</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 3:41am<b>cutiegirl12326</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 7:25pm<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:46am<b>Noah_Lynx</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:24am<b>Stoppy23</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:49pm<b>nathansmith1211</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 5:47pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:18pm<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 10:51am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:23pm<b>sevazilla</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:11pm

jadeluv's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of jadeluv's badges

jadeluv's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor knocked on my door to borrow my laundry room key. He was bare-ass naked. When I refused to open the door, he tried to break it down. I had to call the police before he would leave. FML

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

#20738804
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49351) - you deserved it (10409)

On 06/21/2013 at 10:28am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

#20735100
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47272) - you deserved it (4797)

On 06/19/2013 at 12:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went fishing with my dad. I figured, since we were out on the dock, I may as well get rid of my farmer's tan. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up to a fishing net draped over me. I now have a fishnet pattern down the front of my body. FML

#20730236
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39402) - you deserved it (11220)

On 06/16/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by jhughes1997 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he discovered that if he hits a certain area just right, my leg starts shaking like a dog. Now he won't stop patting my head and saying, "Who's a good girl?!" FML

#20727770
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60559) - you deserved it (9430)

On 06/15/2013 at 4:26pm - intimacy - by woof woof?? (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73361) - you deserved it (7248)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37693) - you deserved it (68479)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to pick up my 6-year-old son from his friend's house. They were having a great time, and he didn't want to leave. So, while I wasn't looking, he superglued both his hands to their kitchen table. FML

#20720952
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51678) - you deserved it (5161)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, I was in the bathroom at work when I ran out of toilet paper. There was another guy in the restroom so I asked him if he could hand me a roll. He laughed, called me a dumbass, turned off the lights and walked out. FML

#20717345
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50855) - you deserved it (5696)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:55am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my friend got dumped. I wanted to say, "You must be devastated", thinking, "That really sucks." I said, "You must really suck." FML

#20717146
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44189) - you deserved it (12821)

On 06/10/2013 at 7:22am - misc - by Oops (woman) - United States

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61211) - you deserved it (13860)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I got to drive my mom's car. I'd recently watched the new Fast and Furious movie, I thought it'd be fun to drift around a few corners. I ended up smashing straight into someone's front yard. FML

#20712154
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19652) - you deserved it (110483)

On 06/07/2013 at 6:00pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML

#20712090
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67171) - you deserved it (9250)

On 06/07/2013 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by what the fuck (woman) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, my band and I played at our first ever real gig. Our drummer turned up high out of his damn mind. After ruining our act with his godawful performance, he screamed "HELL YEAH!" then ran and dove off the stage into a nearly non-existent audience. We were told to never come back. FML

#20711923
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49346) - you deserved it (5195)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:32pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML

#20708788
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56308) - you deserved it (6021)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: