Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jadeluv

Search for a member

jadeluv

27Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 April 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6143
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jadeluv : Dude, stop being a stalker and just message me already (:

jadeluv's page activity

Visits<b>blcksocks</b> - 23 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:36pm<b>nygiantsfan85</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 4:46pm<b>ibChase714</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:19pm<b>tyler_jay</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:34pm<b>mexeuphemism</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:15am<b>HelloMatey</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 10:29am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 5:18pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:55pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 8:28am<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 11:18pm<b>mookie10</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 10:03pm<b>Madridsta</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 11:23pm<b>hardesty</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 10:33am<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 6:09am<b>saba_ajira</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 5:45am<b>Faddyy6</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 3:55am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 12:40am

Liked!<b>mookie10</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:39pm<b>24jfred</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:54am<b>baseball27LD</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 2:02am<b>Zacky_Chan</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 10:56am<b>apgreen69</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 2:58am<b>pratikp03</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 12:53pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 5:38am<b>_just_joshin_ya</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 3:41am<b>cutiegirl12326</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 7:25pm<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:46am<b>Noah_Lynx</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:24am<b>Stoppy23</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:49pm<b>nathansmith1211</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 5:47pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:18pm<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 10:51am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:23pm<b>sevazilla</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:11pm<b>ThaBoss12</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 3:53am

jadeluv's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of jadeluv's badges

jadeluv's favorite FMLs

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60237) - you deserved it (7635)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60237) - you deserved it (7635)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I found out that when I text my boyfriend, he isn't the one to read them. Instead, he pays his friend to "keep the bitch busy." FML

#20813368
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60035) - you deserved it (6362)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:49pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53629) - you deserved it (8522)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, while I was eating cereal, my mother thought it would be appropriate to grab the bowl and start spoon-feeding me while making airplane noises, again. I'm 19. FML

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

#20809554
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62558) - you deserved it (5425)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by PrettyScared (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my family and I went to feed carrots to the giraffes at the zoo. After I finished my first cup of carrots, I turned back to get some more. Suddenly, I was jerked back and a chunk of my hair was ripped out. The giraffe mistook the orange barrette in my hair for a carrot. FML

#20809312
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44644) - you deserved it (9627)

On 07/29/2013 at 4:19am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

#20809215
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51346) - you deserved it (7572)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:35am - love - by confusedmofo - Indonesia

Today, I did a photoshoot with my boyfriend and his buddy. We drove out to the countryside and set up on top of a hill. My boyfriend kept having me move further and further back. I eventually fell and rolled down the steep hill, while he and his buddy high-fived each other. FML

#20808454
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47678) - you deserved it (6956)

On 07/28/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to try something new in the bedroom, so she got an assortment of different sized cock rings. She laughed when the one we were trying to use kept falling off, and said to try a smaller one. It was the smallest in the set. FML

#20807595
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61257) - you deserved it (8756)

On 07/28/2013 at 3:45am - intimacy - by microlovin (man) - United States (California)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40924) - you deserved it (27596)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finished off the last of the BBQ chips in the house. When my 6-year-old sister found out about it, she started screaming, then pulled down her pants and peed on the kitchen floor. My parents, after witnessing the whole thing, bitched me out for upsetting her. FML

#20806438
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55182) - you deserved it (4254)

On 07/27/2013 at 2:31pm - kids - by poopiter (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML

#20805942
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43606) - you deserved it (24611)

On 07/27/2013 at 4:03am - love - by good_aim (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about how I'm jealous of her best guy friend always hanging around her. She responded by saying, "Wait, I thought you knew I was dating him too?" FML

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56322) - you deserved it (9333)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: