jadeluv

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Offline (the 07/01/2016 at 5:47am)

jadeluv

165Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 April 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11842
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jadeluv : Dude, stop being a stalker and just message me already (:

Main reasons I'll give you a fuck (sounds so werid, haha), but like I was saying, main reasons: I think you have nice eyes, you have an animal in your profile picture, or you have a nice smile.

jadeluv's page activity

Visits<b>VorpikeII</b> - 5 hours ago<b>10nachoman10</b> - 11 hours ago<b>Captobvious19</b> - yesterday at 11:29pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 8:06pm<b>Chris_1414</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 7:34am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 9:54pm<b>matman82</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 1:54pm<b>xcarlito615x</b> - the 11/08/2016 at 12:31am<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 11/05/2016 at 2:45am<b>jaysoccer27</b> - the 10/23/2016 at 8:04pm<b>xlJOEY</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 9:24pm<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 10/15/2016 at 3:53pm<b>braver7315</b> - the 10/15/2016 at 2:21pm<b>debuono420</b> - the 10/06/2016 at 12:05pm<b>notmedo</b> - the 10/01/2016 at 5:21pm<b>julianbozikovic</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 4:59pm<b>mahughes</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 2:53am<b>beffnytutt</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 8:42am

Fucked!<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 3:55am<b>Chris_1414</b> - the 10/24/2016 at 6:02am<b>jaysoccer27</b> - the 10/24/2016 at 2:04am<b>madnessking</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 6:26am<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 4:17am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 9:41pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 2:37pm<b>NH_Freelancer</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 12:22am<b>infernno</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 4:58am<b>Ironmayhem</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 7:39am<b>papa_vas</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 3:07am<b>ford99</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 12:21pm<b>armedenglish96</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 10:24am<b>supermarxiste75</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 12:07am<b>Sir_Cow</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 7:00pm<b>NateC27</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 5:33pm<b>thatfmlguy25</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 5:18am<b>hardflip95</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 3:21pm

jadeluv's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of jadeluv's badges

jadeluv's favorite FMLs

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2014 at 9:29pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, out of boredom, I built my cat a little fort. Later, I decided to crawl inside to pet her, but as soon as I stuck my head in, she clawed me. I guess I'm not allowed in, then. FML

by unloved cat owner / 02/15/2014 at 7:50pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, a guy called customer support, claiming his internet wasn't working. I asked for his customer details, and he gave his name as Mike Hunt. I recognized the old joke, called him an idiot, and hung up on him. It turned out that was his real name. I'm now on suspension. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2014 at 4:39pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:47am / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:20am / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML

by Unknown / 02/07/2014 at 9:18am / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

by wtfjusthappened / 01/31/2014 at 10:29am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I fell asleep at my bus stop following a long day at work. I woke up to a homeless man giggling after he had clipped dozens of clothespins to my clothes, shoes, and hair in my sleep. FML

by 43_clothespins_later / 11/20/2013 at 7:12pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

by clodius / 11/20/2013 at 1:25pm / United Kingdom (North Lanarkshire) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.