About jackassiddy : Just a regular guy with a lot of irregularities. I tend to be pretty straight forward except for when I bend the truth. Most of the time I'm funny on occasion. Okay, but seriously I tend to joke around.
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jackassiddy's favorite FMLs
by robincakes94 / 11/29/2011 at 7:42am / United States / Work
by dasteve / 11/29/2011 at 12:45am / United States (Idaho) / Money
by fuuuuck / 11/28/2011 at 6:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
Today, in science class, we had to make play-dough with our lab partners. We were allowed to put one thing in it to make it more bouncy or rubbery. My partner said that he wanted to put a chicken wing in ours. FML
by Anonymous / 11/28/2011 at 10:45am / United States / Geek
Today, my husband asked me, "Why do you love me?" I spent the next five minutes spilling my heart and soul out to him. After I'd asked the same question, he looked me straight in the eye and said, "I don't." FML
by nirvana_mama157 / 11/28/2011 at 7:51am / United States (District of Columbia) / Love
by tireedddddd / 11/25/2011 at 11:24am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 11/25/2011 at 11:15am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Dickhead / 11/25/2011 at 10:02am / Lebanon / Intimacy
Today, I tried to buy a bottle of wine from the supermarket. The scrawny, acne-ridden kid at the checkout asked to see my ID. I didn't have any on me, since I'm 37 years old and didn't expect to be asked stupid questions. I complained to his manager, only to be asked to leave. FML
by Andrew / 11/24/2011 at 3:19pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous
Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML
by cduran2011 / 10/14/2011 at 11:23am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML
by Eet- / 10/13/2011 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/13/2011 at 12:56pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I showed my boyfriend a calendar, marked with the number of times we've had sex over the past month. Then followed by a calendar of the month before, which had almost triple the number of hits. I had to point out that our stats need to improve. FML
by friskeyk14 / 10/04/2011 at 3:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML
by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation
by spartanson / 04/28/2011 at 6:28am / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…