jackassiddy

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jackassiddy

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1410
  • Number of comments : 169
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jackassiddy : Just a regular guy with a lot of irregularities. I tend to be pretty straight forward except for when I bend the truth. Most of the time I'm funny on occasion. Okay, but seriously I tend to joke around.

jackassiddy's page activity

Visits<b>Zatalmas</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 2:34pm<b>taco_catsweater</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 6:29pm<b>elfcat</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Loomunati</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 9:32am<b>shabadabba</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 6:20pm<b>LittlePengy</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 4:08pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 9:11pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:30am<b>Mortoli</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 12:43pm<b>singer0421</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 11:19pm<b>Wolfipoo</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 5:19pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:27pm<b>NomeDMF</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:49pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:57am<b>justinccp</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:39pm<b>Caroline1812</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:28pm<b>twitchtail</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 11:19am<b>anonymousXD_</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 11:46am

Fucked!<b>twitchtail</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 5:19pm<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:51am<b>surranger</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 4:07am

jackassiddy's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

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jackassiddy's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a nursing home to sing Christmas carols to the elderly. They threw their bananas at me. FML

by robincakes94 / 11/29/2011 at 7:42am / United States / Work

Today, I won $20 on a scratch ticket my grandma bought me. She wants it back. FML

by dasteve / 11/29/2011 at 12:45am / United States (Idaho) / Money

Today, I had a big presentation to do at work, so I got up early and ran myself a bath. I woke up three hours later, extremely late, and still in the bath. FML

by fuuuuck / 11/28/2011 at 6:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, in science class, we had to make play-dough with our lab partners. We were allowed to put one thing in it to make it more bouncy or rubbery. My partner said that he wanted to put a chicken wing in ours. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2011 at 10:45am / United States / Geek

Today, my husband asked me, "Why do you love me?" I spent the next five minutes spilling my heart and soul out to him. After I'd asked the same question, he looked me straight in the eye and said, "I don't." FML

by nirvana_mama157 / 11/28/2011 at 7:51am / United States (District of Columbia) / Love

Today, I was woken up at 6am to the sound of my mother on the back deck of the house hooting like an owl. FML

by tireedddddd / 11/25/2011 at 11:24am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the smell of bacon. It smelled so good, and made me very hungry. Then I realized it was my neighbor cooking. I have no money or bacon. FML

by Username / 11/25/2011 at 11:15am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

by Dickhead / 11/25/2011 at 10:02am / Lebanon / Intimacy

Today, I tried to buy a bottle of wine from the supermarket. The scrawny, acne-ridden kid at the checkout asked to see my ID. I didn't have any on me, since I'm 37 years old and didn't expect to be asked stupid questions. I complained to his manager, only to be asked to leave. FML

by Andrew / 11/24/2011 at 3:19pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous

Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML

by cduran2011 / 10/14/2011 at 11:23am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML

by Eet- / 10/13/2011 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Love

Today, my boyfriend informed me that to save money, he's been using the same condom for the last month. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2011 at 12:56pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I showed my boyfriend a calendar, marked with the number of times we've had sex over the past month. Then followed by a calendar of the month before, which had almost triple the number of hits. I had to point out that our stats need to improve. FML

by friskeyk14 / 10/04/2011 at 3:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML

by spartanson / 04/28/2011 at 6:28am / Miscellaneous