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itsmichellebitch

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itsmichellebitch
  • Town/Country : I'mnotadinosaur, I'm A Fucking Unicorn.
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 December 1999 (14 years)
  • Number of visits : 343
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About itsmichellebitch : Rawr. I'm a dinosaur. Just kidding I'm a unicorn. You can message me if you wanna. Music is my life. I would literally die without it. I kinda love Bruno Mars. I love singing and acting. Takenn! Well that's it I guess. Byee.

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itsmichellebitch's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband decided he would rather rage-wank to my mum's Facebook profile picture than make love to me. FML

#20741061
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42080) - you deserved it (4566)

On 06/22/2013 at 2:54pm - love - by talktothefacecausethehandswanking (woman) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, it marks the fourth month since my 15-year-old cousin asked me out, then started practically stalking me when I said no. It's also the fourth month of my parents and his constantly telling me to stop overreacting and that it's "just a phase." FML

#20740640
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41040) - you deserved it (2869)

On 06/22/2013 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML

#20740399
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28689) - you deserved it (45303)

On 06/22/2013 at 3:31am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

#20739366
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61845) - you deserved it (5022)

On 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I came back from the doctor after having been diagnosed with a UTI. My dad now won't shut up about it, saying stuff like, "You must be 'pissed'", "Looks like 'urine' a bit of pain", and "'Urea'-lly need some antibiotics, son", all while making obnoxious finger quotes in the air. FML

#20739103
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37606) - you deserved it (4026)

On 06/21/2013 at 2:05pm - health - by assholedad (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

#20738899
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44293) - you deserved it (3147)

On 06/21/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by lehonj49 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while running on the treadmill at the gym, I tried to wipe some sweat off my brow before it could make its way down into my eye. I ended up poking myself in the eye so hard that I yelped, stumbled and was thrown off the still-moving treadmill while trying to regain my balance. FML

#20738117
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34247) - you deserved it (5874)

On 06/20/2013 at 11:06pm - health - by Ouch (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a guy's car broke down in my street, so I helped him push it into my driveway, checked his car out, and gave it a jump start. He thanked me, then as he went to pull out, he instead smashed straight into my car. FML

#20737568
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45279) - you deserved it (3461)

On 06/20/2013 at 5:13pm - misc - by clop clop clopping all the way (man) - United States



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