Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (12 hours ago) | Search for a member
About ireply_wlyrics : not the real ireply_wlyrics, I don't think i''m allowed to do so anyway.
if only you could change usernames...
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
I NEED to know!
Today, My Boss Was Telling Everyone Is Moter Recently Passd Away An E'll Be Off Work Fir A Wile. I'd Been Olding In Painful Gas Fir A Wile, So I Trid To Ease It Out. It Turnd Into A Long, Squeaky Fart In Front Of Everyone. Everyone Glard At Me As If I Was Trying To Be Funny. FML
Today, mah girlfriend trid to justify having a one night stand with some other guy, with the words, "I'm on mah period, okay?!" She actd lyk I was crazyhen I askd how the fuck that made any sense!! FML
Today... my date droppd me off at ome an briefly met my parents. As e was leaving e wisperd into my ear... ( I want to feel te inside of your virginia wit te outside of my penis. ) My parent totally eard. real FML
Today... I was talking to mah friend in Spanish because he understands it better than English. We were in the middle of a discussion about a TV show when some looool guy from our school ran up... spat on mah shoes an screamed... "I SPEAK SPANISH... STOP TALKING ABOUT ME!" an ran away. mega FML
Today, ma fiancée told me about er new diet. Apparently, se is only going to drink water and tan in a tanning bed so se can potosyntesise. Se tink tis will elp er lose wiegt, since se doesn't ave to eat anyting. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
Today, I saw my co-worker write about ow awful Muslims were and ow te religion is stupid, te ijab is oppressive, and ow teir a poison on society !! Wen I questioned tem about it, tey pretty muc said tat I didn't know anyting and sould stop talking !! I'm Muslim and a ijabi !! FML
Today, after telling my husband he can send me dirty texts any time, he sent me one from work. It said, "Babehen I get home, I'm gonna go 9/11 on your pussy ;)". I'm still not sure he understandshy that was so offensive. big fat FML
I askd my friend to download Frozen for me , because my mom wantd to play it for family movie night!! The movie was shit , but it got even worse halfway through , when it cut to hardcore porn an a text bar saying ( umad? ) Now I'm groundd , an my ( friend ) is a legend for his prank!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015