About ireply_wlyrics : ao4j.com
not the real ireply_wlyrics, I don't think i''m allowed to do so anyway.
if only you could change usernames...
About ireply_wlyrics : ao4j.com
ireply_wlyrics's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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ireply_wlyrics's favorite FMLs
Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML
by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/14/2011 at 12:52pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I'm staying with my mother for a week. Every time I eat something, she tells me that it's "swimsuit season" and that I need to eat less. Every time I say I'm not hungry, she panics and insists I have an eating disorder. I can't win. FML
by argh / 07/13/2011 at 7:49pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 9:31am / United States (Illinois) / Health
by whyme102008 / 07/13/2011 at 2:32am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by whyme / 07/13/2011 at 1:40am / United States (California) / Love
Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML
by dummy / 07/11/2011 at 3:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids
Today, I saw a Red Tailed Hawk land on my car and spend a few minutes looking at his reflection in the windshield. This was all really neat until I found out he badly scratched my hood with his large talons. FML
by MakeItMaaco / 07/11/2011 at 1:56pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation
by Username / 07/11/2011 at 1:42pm / United States / Health
by illenram06 / 07/11/2011 at 11:37am / Philippines (Roxas) / Love
by cocacoola / 07/11/2011 at 10:24am / Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla) / Kids
Today, I took my 16 year-old daughter to get a bank account, taking her birth certificate with us as requested. When the teller wrote her name down on a piece of paper, my daughter said "How do you know my name?" The teller just looked at her and held up her birth certificate. I raised a nitwit. FML
by Mothering / 07/11/2011 at 5:25am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
Today, it's my birthday. The present I received from my best friend was the exact same necklace which I gave to her for her birthday two months ago. It had been unwrapped and re-wrapped in the same paper. FML
by Vic / 07/11/2011 at 5:00am / Denmark / Miscellaneous
Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML
by Anonymous / 07/11/2011 at 3:42am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a text message from my ex from about a year ago, asking if my 4-day-old son was his. I don't know what's sadder - the fact that he thinks a gestation period can last 11 months, or that he's more willing to step up to the plate than the baby's actual father. FML
by Anonymous / 07/11/2011 at 12:48am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I received an email from my boyfriend. It contained a link to a site that was titled "How to… Today, I sat awkwardly and pretended like I didn't notice my cousin discreetly trying to masturbate… Today, I realized how bad my sex life is when I scratched a mosquito bite and almost had an orgasm.…