About ireply_wlyrics : ao4j.com
not the real ireply_wlyrics, I don't think i''m allowed to do so anyway.
if only you could change usernames...
About ireply_wlyrics : ao4j.com
ireply_wlyrics's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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ireply_wlyrics's favorite FMLs
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
by ugh / 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I went to deliver some reports to my boss in his office. He was facing away from me and ranting about his "useless employees", so I slipped in and waited for him to put the phone down. Turns out he was talking to himself. When he noticed me, he bitched me out and threatened to fire me. FML
by robert / 01/30/2012 at 7:20pm / United States (Texas) / Work
Today, I learnt there's a woman who comes into my store only to hear my Barry White-like voice. My boss knows who it is, yet refuses to tell me because it's "hilarious." I'm now cautious of every customer. FML
by Anonymous / 01/30/2012 at 4:00am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from too much alcohol, my 2-year-old alone and locked in the bathroom, and my house in a complete wreck. To top it off, it's the day my mother-in-law, who hates me, is coming to visit from New York. FML
by myself / 01/30/2012 at 12:24am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, I finally made the last payment on the beautiful engagement ring I bought and proposed with - two years ago. To my ex-girlfriend, who said no and promptly started sleeping with one of my friends. FML
by brokeandsingle / 01/29/2012 at 4:55am / United Kingdom (York) / Love
by ParkerRommel / 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my family had dinner with my future in-laws for the first time. After a bottle of wine to herself, my mother loudly insisted that I'm out of her will. Apparently, I "molest towels" and leave them to "fester for days" in my "den of depravity". I'm sure they'll give me their daughter now. FML
by The Towel Molester / 01/26/2012 at 9:49am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/25/2012 at 11:18pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by JMcKay / 01/25/2012 at 10:36pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by wish.was.single / 01/25/2012 at 1:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I had to do community service work, so I helped out at a senior center. One of the confused elderly patients, who believed the Cold War was still on, thought I was a Soviet and started screaming about how I was going to nuke his country. FML
by communistgirl / 01/24/2012 at 11:42am / United States / Work
Today, I woke up to the sound of a Suburban crashing through my fence and striking the tree in my front yard. After filling out the police report, the driver repeatedly asked me to give him a lift to work. He seemed confused by my speechlessness. FML
by Anonymous / 01/22/2012 at 12:57pm / United States (Nevada) / Transportation
Today, I got really bored so I posted on Facebook "Someone should kidnap me for the day." My mom commented, "The only things willing to kidnap you are aliens, and that would be because they'd mistaken you for a cow." 16 people liked her comment. FML
by LonerCow / 01/20/2012 at 10:15am / United States / Miscellaneous
by MakesMeLol / 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
by Shameful / 01/18/2012 at 2:57pm / United States (Alabama) / Health