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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2707
  • Number of comments : 175
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About invadermaythe1st : I like FML because humour.
You could also find me on ifunny, from time to time :p

invadermaythe1st's page activity

Visits<b>catherinecas</b> - 54 minutes ago<b>kayposion</b> - 10 hours ago<b>raven83</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 11:33am<b>C7</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:47pm<b>lesousterre</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 6:02pm<b>Misha93</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 8:08pm<b>vintral88</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 2:16pm<b>Zee_Mills</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 6:25am<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 7:10pm<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 3:26pm<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 6:45pm<b>sythe511</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:25pm<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 2:41pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 2:56am<b>moiqbal</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 1:28pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 12:09am<b>TCRII</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 6:44pm<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:52am

Fucked!<b>catherinecas</b> - just now<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 12:45am<b>gshocker20</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:26am<b>Mezzacarina</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 10:21pm<b>love_struck97</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 6:53am<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 5:15pm<b>littleking94</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 3:09pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 1:19pm<b>Fredrico011</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 6:40am<b>Pike313</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 4:32am<b>amine91</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Shayn_25</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:45am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:27am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:25am<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 11:39pm<b>Thoricsteam20</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 12:40am<b>wassuploves</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 8:27pm

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invadermaythe1st's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with someone I considered a real catch, my potential soulmate even. He ended up telling me about his fetish for "female smells", sang loudly in Italian in a crowded restaurant, and ate most of the food on my plate. Man, fuck dating. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21700) - you deserved it (2177)

On 08/20/2015 at 2:02am - love - by Catsfordays - United States (California)

Today, a dog bit me on the bus. Instead of apologising, its owner said it was my fault because my hands "must smell of meat". I'm a vegetarian. FML

Today, I went on a Segway tour in Budapest. The Segways have an automatic speed limiter, and to release it and get back to normal speed, you have to brake. Unfortunately, I forgot my speed limiter was on and so, while trying to break, I instead returned to normal speed and crashed into a tree. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19970) - you deserved it (4089)

On 06/30/2015 at 4:31pm - misc - by infrontofninepeople - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that me and her father's wedding is just a big joke and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23894) - you deserved it (2521)

On 06/24/2015 at 12:02am - love - by bummed out step monster - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML


I agree, your life sucks (26434) - you deserved it (3140)

On 06/22/2015 at 3:55pm - love - by Partners (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I accidentally sat on my sister's imaginary monkey. She then stabbed me with a pencil. I still can't get the piece of graphite out of my hand. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24975) - you deserved it (2310)

On 06/22/2015 at 3:10pm - kids - by vkryss13 - Guam

Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20950) - you deserved it (12937)

On 06/19/2015 at 9:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (36071) - you deserved it (7553)

On 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I took my girlfriend home to introduce her to my parents. As we arrived, my grandpa was leaving the bathroom. He looked over at my girlfriend with a worried expression and said "Never take a shit in this place! Feels like I wiped my arsehole with sandpaper." FML


I agree, your life sucks (26096) - you deserved it (2355)

On 06/06/2015 at 3:32am - work - by justin bieber's nutsack (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I told my boyfriend I was horny and was waiting for him at my place. 30 minutes later, he still hadn't arrived, so I called him and asked if he was coming. He replied "Already did, right into a kleenex." and hung up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30676) - you deserved it (3933)

On 06/04/2015 at 8:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my 14 year old brother and 9 year old sister were fighting. My brother said "You suck!" to my sister, and she replied with "You swallow!" FML

Today, my new doctor asked if I'm sexually active. I said no. He nodded and murmured "No surprise there." Thanks, mate. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28144) - you deserved it (2491)

On 05/24/2015 at 11:56am - misc - by Mona Lisa was a skank-ass ho (man) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37155) - you deserved it (3244)

On 05/20/2015 at 4:45am - intimacy - by wtf bro (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29501) - you deserved it (4519)

On 05/19/2015 at 2:45am - intimacy - by username - United Kingdom (Surrey)

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