im_joking

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im_joking

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 October 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 909
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About im_joking : Hey my name is Joe. I'm from Saint Louis. To pass time between school and work I like to play Diplomacy! Also, I love and hate politics and am a big conservative

im_joking's page activity

Visits<b>theepicpotato</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 10:33pm<b>tannere</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 3:32pm<b>umadbromad</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:01am<b>redraven88</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 8:30am<b>Alvarortor</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 2:37am<b>Storm2398</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 9:21pm<b>CrazayPanda</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 2:05am<b>8born8</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 11:03pm<b>mcm_3</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 7:59pm<b>xFaust</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 4:10am<b>brearayanne</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 3:14pm<b>straww</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 5:37pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 11:34am<b>LAUREN_1053</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 8:04am<b>flatout4</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 10:17pm<b>michel242o</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 6:57pm<b>pacelily</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 3:23pm<b>wackadoodle103</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 4:01pm

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im_joking's favorite FMLs

Today, I was about to make a left turn. In the turn lane a little old lady was waiting for the light to change. On the back of her car was a bumper sticker that said "Honk if you love Jesus!" I gave her a honk and waved. She leaned out and yelled, "The light's red, asshole." FML

by TNDriver / 07/16/2013 at 9:12am / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation

Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2013 at 12:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

by Never Going Back To The Doctor / 07/04/2013 at 3:03am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

by Thanks Honey / 06/05/2013 at 11:08am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me screaming, "My precious!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 6:36pm / United Kingdom (Thurrock) / Miscellaneous

Today, working in customer support, I received a call from a woman who'd just been robbed. My supervisor asked what was taking so long; I told him that she was hysterical. He took my phone and told her to call back when she had her "shit together", then hung up. I take orders from this man. FML

by no compassion / 04/16/2013 at 6:50am / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I had phone sex with my boyfriend. He had an asthma attack. FML

by JRLJLS / 04/15/2013 at 5:09am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2013 at 5:24am / Australia / Love

Today, my friends and I were exchanging stories with one another. I barely got a few sentences in before they started mocking and viciously insulting me for saying "swaggered", claiming it comes from the slang term "swag", and that they never thought I was a "dumbass hipster". Really now? FML

by nice education you've got there / 04/09/2013 at 5:04pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started training for a charity boxing match. When I got home and walked through the door, my dad punched me in the stomach to test my reaction time. As I lay on the floor trying to catch my breath, he said my reaction time was "terrible". FML

by DJ / 04/07/2013 at 2:52pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching a movie with my parents when a sex scene came on. As if that wasn't awkward enough, they started making out on the couch behind me. FML

by ohgodwhy / 04/06/2013 at 10:15am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy