idancewithllamas

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idancewithllamas

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1706
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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idancewithllamas's page activity

Visits<b>Asterix84</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 9:22pm<b>frankiemz</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:30pm<b>andonceagain</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 1:49pm<b>sopy1875</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 8:07pm<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 2:25am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 4:11pm<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 2:12am<b>pinkshirtbadman</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 2:25pm<b>emmyknd123</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 5:10pm<b>olpally</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 1:26pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 7:17am<b>dotalover</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 4:27am<b>imchacon22</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 1:06am<b>Valdrek</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 12:28pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 10:17pm<b>chamay</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 8:56pm<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 10:04am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 12:32pm

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idancewithllamas's favorite FMLs

Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML

by DumbCuntApparently / 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML

by Acolyte of the Bacon God / 02/15/2013 at 2:50pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized I'm so lonely that I get comfort from hearing my neighbor snore through my apartment wall. FML

by LilRedRiding_27 / 01/13/2013 at 2:24am / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2012 at 10:02am / Australia / Kids

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

by anonymaiacciu / 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure. The pedicurist began examining my feet, then called his coworkers over to demonstrate how to deal with "excessively crusty" feet. FML

by Crusty / 12/19/2012 at 3:53pm / Health

Today, the girl I dumped three years ago because she wouldn't take my band seriously is now a successful and rich environmental scientist. Meanwhile, I'm still unemployed, living with my parents, and can barely remember how to play a guitar. FML

by rightinthekarma / 12/19/2012 at 10:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I went on a cruise. I gave my bags to a porter, and tipped him $5. Later that night, my bags still hadn't arrived at my room, and that's when I realized that I'd paid a fake porter to steal my bags. FML

by McFizzy321 / 12/12/2012 at 10:43pm / United States (Florida) / Holidays

Today, I had to create a perfect society in English class; the best society has their grade go up a full letter. After tons of preparation and thinking, I lost to an island made only of cheese. FML

by JPPUDLY / 12/11/2012 at 6:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to talk to a girl at the gym I had seen there a lot. I walked up to her at the station she was at and asked her out to dinner sometime. I didn't realize she had been wearing headphones. She took them off and asked if I was waiting on the station. My courage left. I said yes. FML

by Aaron / 12/09/2012 at 6:34pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, my grandmother and I turned up to a family function wearing the same outfit. FML

by Awks / 11/30/2012 at 1:30am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

by childhoodupinsmoke / 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my step-mom restarted the computer because she thought she'd downloaded a virus that stopped her from being able to click on anything, erasing my 7-page paper in the process. It turns out it was just the batteries dying in our wireless mouse. FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, in a state of extreme boredom, I decided to dress my 6-month-old son in girl's clothes. As he sat in my lap in a frilly dress, and as I was placing a very pink and lacy bow on his head, my mother-in-law unexpectedly walked in. She now thinks I'm mentally unstable and should be in therapy. FML

by ekm86 / 11/26/2012 at 11:52am / United States (Oregon) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.