icyfire617

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icyfire617

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 June 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3726
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About icyfire617 : I'm not a bird

icyfire617's page activity

Visits<b>TexanZaros</b> - 5 hours ago<b>jill97</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 8:49am<b>raaron773</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 5:53am<b>vampivy23</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 3:59pm<b>SweetSociopathy</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 8:43pm<b>rashdog</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 12:17am<b>KristaleFaith</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 2:35am<b>Cortezthe1st</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 1:28pm<b>HerpaderpGlaze</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:23pm<b>heyyyjune</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 5:18am<b>raflcr</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 8:27am<b>NSKFML</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 4:55am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:29pm<b>safaeita</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 12:34pm<b>elibel</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 12:01am<b>fuckallyoupeople</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 8:08pm<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 9:52pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 10:25pm

icyfire617's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of icyfire617's badges

icyfire617's favorite FMLs

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

by nosestealer / 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2013 at 12:16am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML

by seriously! / 03/19/2013 at 1:00am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML

by peace out / 03/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (South Carolina) / Kids

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML

by black and yellow / 01/21/2013 at 1:32am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

by anon / 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML

by divingconfidence / 12/22/2012 at 6:21am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

by ayye_its_nikki / 12/19/2012 at 12:07am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML

by lingling / 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

by childhoodupinsmoke / 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

by ladylol / 11/24/2012 at 8:54am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Intimacy