iGiveNoDamn

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iGiveNoDamn

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 May 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3209
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About iGiveNoDamn : Who cares?!!!

iGiveNoDamn's page activity

Visits<b>tessamarie19</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 7:34pm<b>tpm45</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 6:45am<b>numbwanderlust</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 8:21pm<b>StephC720</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 11:25pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 8:29pm<b>Jaredphamtom</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 12:39pm<b>carleybeak</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 9:40am<b>Codezlol</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 2:33pm<b>TheTrumpeter3</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 10:52pm<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 1:51pm<b>BronzeShoe</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 1:31am<b>Futacy</b> - the 09/05/2012 at 4:19pm

iGiveNoDamn's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of iGiveNoDamn's badges

iGiveNoDamn's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a bus to the city. When I sat down, my hand accidentally slapped again the knee of the guy sitting next to me. I apologized. He responded, "It's just a knee," and started stroking mine. This lasted the entire ride. FML

by That_Teenager_ / 02/17/2016 at 9:01pm / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I spent hours cooking a big dinner for my parents for the first time. I guess I made the steak too rare, because when my dad cut into it, he said "Christ! This thing's practically alive!" and said a skilled vet could probably bring the cow it was cut from back to life. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2015 at 1:05am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML

by henhouse / 07/18/2015 at 7:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML

by henhouse / 07/18/2015 at 7:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally texted the girl I like, "Oh god, I just choked on a boner." I meant bone. FML

by Boneo and Juliet / 07/16/2015 at 3:22pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had decided that I was ready to have sex with my boyfriend. So, I called him and told him how naughty I felt, only to realize that I had called my dad. FML

by EternalBlossom / 07/14/2015 at 1:03am / United States / Intimacy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, some homeless person came up to the window and started doing a voice-over. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2015 at 11:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, what my friends call my "resting bitch face" freaked my boyfriend out enough during sex that he went soft inside me. FML

by sa la vash / 03/14/2015 at 4:22am / Netherlands / Intimacy

Today, my professor cancelled class so I turned off my alarm. When I woke up, I checked my email again. There was no email from my professor. It was a dream. FML

by DreamsDontComeTrue / 02/05/2015 at 1:15am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer blatantly farted as I sat down, then she sneered, "Making yourself comfortable, I see..." FML

by fartje / 01/25/2015 at 1:21pm / Netherlands / Work

Today, I was locked out of my house. As I was about to knock on the window to ask my girlfriend to let me in, I saw her on the sofa, digging a huge booger out of her nose and eating it. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2014 at 12:17pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my father picked me up from the police academy I'm attending, and got caught speeding. The officer was my drill instructor, and I had to do push-ups on the side of the highway. FML

by Xx_DEXIJOKER_xX / 11/11/2014 at 10:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2014 at 10:37am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to explain to my father why it isn't a good idea to shove a metal knife into the toaster when trying to get at a small piece of toast. This man is 45-years-old and has a PhD. FML

Today, my dad asked me how I would feel about going on an all-expenses-paid, month-long holiday to the Caribbean. I was ecstatic and broke into tears of joy, saying I'd love it. He replied, "Yeah, me too. Shame it ain't happening!" then left for work, laughing his arse off. FML

by xXshitface4uXx / 07/25/2014 at 6:46pm / New Zealand (Bay of Plenty) / Miscellaneous