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how_to_implode

Offline (the 06/22/2014 at 3:00am) | Search for a member

how_to_implode

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  • Number of visits : 1964
  • Number of comments : 142
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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how_to_implode's page activity

Visits<b>shaar</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 7:49am<b>TEZZ</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 6:51pm<b>yuhboi</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 10:36am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 11:16am<b>YellowKettleBell</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 12:14am<b>ryan1268</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 2:29pm<b>Faddyy6</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 9:35am<b>cwl727</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 3:34pm<b>Helldemon</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 9:48pm<b>AfroCircusMan</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 3:09pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 1:52pm<b>FuckFace10</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 1:40pm<b>HersheySquirts</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 7:22pm<b>shadow619r</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 9:49pm<b>kuro93</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 8:40am<b>Zeus1070</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 11:05pm<b>Marine6297</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 10:57pm<b>sarahperez</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 10:16pm

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how_to_implode's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML

#21092226
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42087) - you deserved it (3025)

On 03/20/2014 at 11:04pm - misc - by nehadrihan - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend stormed out after I suggested to him that his relationship with his mother is maybe a little weird. Apparently having regular, hour-long phone discussions about your penis is a perfectly normal thing for a 23-year-old to have with his mother. FML

#21089774
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53990) - you deserved it (6535)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:14am - intimacy - by tiredofcrazy (woman) - Australia

Today, I walked into my elderly client's home for my first day of work. I was immediately hit in the eye with something small, and had to get medical attention for a scratched cornea. It turns out my client likes to clip his toenails right by his front door. FML

#21088031
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38655) - you deserved it (3165)

On 03/16/2014 at 10:00am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, every "entry level" job in my field is now requiring 2-5 years experience. I don't think they understand what "entry level" actually means. FML

#21078902
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40036) - you deserved it (3013)

On 03/05/2014 at 4:37pm - work - by mr1234 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

#21077048
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63129) - you deserved it (8534)

On 03/03/2014 at 5:35pm - intimacy - by fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided it was time to tell my daughter that she had been adopted. Not only had she known for 5 years, she found out from my drunk sister. FML

#21076752
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43001) - you deserved it (7760)

On 03/03/2014 at 10:55am - kids - by adopted (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my cat pissed all over my work clothes. They weren't even on the floor, she knocked the hanger down just so she could use them as a toilet. FML

#21073377
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36037) - you deserved it (4431)

On 02/27/2014 at 5:42pm - animals - by baxeh - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

#21069326
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50840) - you deserved it (6701)

On 02/23/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was back home from work drinking coffee when I heard someone open the door with a key. It was my boyfriend, who obviously didn't expect to see me home. We don't live together, and I never gave him a key. FML

#21067356
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47009) - you deserved it (3757)

On 02/21/2014 at 4:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Russian Federation (Lipetsk)

Today, I was doing a science presentation about glucose. There was around 20 judges at the event who could've judged me, but instead I got judged by the only person in the whole entire world who doesn't know what glucose is and doesn't think it exists. FML

#21066140
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42128) - you deserved it (3032)

On 02/20/2014 at 12:27am - work - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

#21061154
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51123) - you deserved it (5081)

On 02/15/2014 at 2:11am - work - by chinaski7628 - United States (California)

Today, and for the third time this week, I found a pubic hair in my soup. I'm currently bed-ridden and can't afford to piss off my boyfriend by complaining. FML

#21054632
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39768) - you deserved it (4839)

On 02/08/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by vey (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I decided to ask the guy I like if he'll be my Valentine. I wrote the question on a piece of paper and passed it to him, trying to be cute. He read it, wrote his answer with a smile, and passed it back. It said, "Depends, do you swallow?" No, no I don't. FML

#21053668
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44146) - you deserved it (9476)

On 02/07/2014 at 7:18pm - love - by mariana (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

#21049445
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45142) - you deserved it (3424)

On 02/03/2014 at 4:16pm - misc - by jai90 (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)



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